11 things that people with depression would like us to know [2018]


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[Disclaimer] Welcome back YouTubers to an Everyday Life
of an Aspie. If you’re new here, I welcome you all. I’m Aspie. I’m all about creating mental health and awareness
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into, feel free to smash them and once you’re down there don’t forget to turn on the notification
bell because as we know that sometimes YouTube doesn’t always send you reminders of certain
everyday occurrences. So, today is going to be another depression
kinda like video topic for the name of the title it is 11 things that people with depression
wants us to know that we can actually be able to educate ourselves and let you know as well
as to what life is like for someone with living with a mental illness in this case Depression. Yes, there is a bit more talk about mental
health or mental illness yet I believe that there is still some stigma and stereotyping
in different ones that you hear about. And some of it still not talked about as it
is taboo and that it is sadly not talked about to bring them out and hopefully in saying
this for the ones that are going through an everyday battle of their mental illness that
I pray and hope that one day that they’ll have the bravery and courage to actually speak
out about their stories. People living with depression or any other
form of mental illness, however, do find it difficult to live with and for the ones that
are close to the ones that struggle with this on the daily can be hard to understand to
why they’re acting a certain way. You know what’s going on inside their head
and so on and so forth. It’s like; urr, come on let us be and whatever
else it may be So, that is why I am here today. Like any other form of mental illnesses, for
the fact of the matter that people being diagnosed with them didn’t choose to have this or even
choose to be depressed as this is a part of their life
and that they don’t wish it upon anyone sometimes with some mental illnesses can be more crippling
than others on the daily… Nobody wants depression or any other mental
illness yet it does come out of the blue unexpectedly. Living with depression can be painful basically
and obviously for the ones that suffer from daily as well as the ones around them. In saying this also, Depression and every
other mental illness that I said in one of my other videos don’t discriminate. Depression doesn’t have an age restriction,
social status and so much more. It just tends to come out of the blue and
wants to party inside the mindset of ours. ONE KEYNOTE TO REMEMBER – Many people assume
that just because the ones that suffer from depression or any other form of mental illness
that many people think that they’re depressed that they’re suicidal. Depression may come with other signs or symptoms
such as suicidal thoughts and the like and the like. But believe you me, They’re not as they are
just your normal average human being. So,. Just when remember to do your homework and
learn about the signs and symptoms of depression or any mental illness for that matter so that
you can be ready to help them in any way if they need it or what have you
If you’re genuinely that concerned about your loved one or whoever you’re with that is at
risk of self-harm and suicide, reach out to them. Don’t forever judge them or what have you. Talk to them and not at them. When it comes to mental illness, some of them
clash a bit with their diagnosis etc yet bear in mind though when you’re talking to them,
you haven’t put the idea in their head suicide or whatever it may be. You may be lucky enough to save
their life, or maybe there to ease of their burden to just by being there and talking
to them. How we actually talk to a person with a mental
illness is important too. Sometimes it can do more than harm than good
into what you’re trying to say to them and how you are saying it to them so basically
you know that is the real deal here so that is why I am here today to hopefully just to
express some of the things that we hear about on a daily because many of us are on a mental
illness train. So, now let’s roll on next part of the video
so that we can express to what we can say or commonly have heard things that you know
people with depression wants us to know. 1) We can’t just snap out of it! Again, the ones that has depression didn’t
choose to have this or live with this. I’ll again repeat that! The ones that have depression didn’t choose
to have this or live with this. This can be frustrating to hear, and it shows
that the person you’re speaking to really doesn’t understand how you’re feeling. You can’t just snap out of depression or another
form of depression or even any other form of mental illness for that matter – it’s
impossible. How the heck can someone with depression snap
out of it? Is the question I want to ask you guys. When you just said this to them, you’re making
them more vulnerable or more worse than they are really feeling by the feeling of isolation,
pushing them away and making them feel more alone. More alone in saying this as in that they
are distancing away from those that have depression and that again they think that by choice you
are choosing to be like the way you are when the sad fact of the reality is that you’re
not. With this in mind, there is for them
a lack of motivation and buzz to get up someday. Like many mental illnesses, it’s a constant
battle inside the mind and that as the saying goes do you know what is
really going on inside of our heads what we are battling with as this is a constant struggle? Do you know what it feels like everyday for
them? As I said before, to maybe walk in their shoes,
be empathetic and patient with them. I would describe depression as feeling like
drowning or even falling down a rabbit hole – no matter how hard you try to fight back
it overpowers you and there’s nothing you can do about it. Many other people will have many other forms
of describing what depression is like a black dog obviously. Or that black dog is following them constantly
or a black cloud weighing over their head and whatever it may be. Depression feels like a constant battle and
it’s extremely exhausting. They’re not asking or seeking sympathy or
attention no far from it. They’re looking for love and acceptance from
us as well as for us to walk in their shoes to see and feel what life is like for them. 2) We don’t always have a reason as to why
we’re feeling depressed. Depression like any other mental illness is
a real form of illness. As said before it can affect anyone at any
age, race, social class and culture. It doesn’t forever discriminate. This is something I’ve noticed others find
hard to understand. To someone who hasn’t ever experienced depression,
it can be easy to assume that it’s caused by an event in someone’s life. Again, as I said in one of my videos that
some of the medical experts still to this day don’t know what the causes of depression
are. Depression can be triggered by life events
such as bereavement or losing your job, but there doesn’t always have to be a reason as
to why someone is depressed. Depression can affect anyone and it’s an illness. Another keynote at hand to point out that-
people with depression don’t have to justify or be in any
form of way to be obligated to tell us to us to why they’re depressed. I used to find that before people were understanding
about some people’s depression they used to expect there to be a reason as to why they
were feeling low and having a bad day when there wasn’t a reason and they couldn’t explain
it to them in how and why they are feeling that way. 3) We don’t want to hurt you People with depression or any other form of
mental illness are still people with feelings and emotions. Just bear that in mind as they’re not robots. They are not empathetic or understanding than
anyone else They have other forms of methods and techniques as that they take on a daily
to cope with. They may just express their feelings and emotions
in a different way to us. They may struggle some of the same battles
that we have, or what we struggle within what they may have in the similar situations that
we going through on that we face etc. Obviously, we are all humans. We all fear of hurting people and after all,
we are all humans. For the most part, people with
a mental illness, many of them may tend to push people away as far as they can until
they’re alone to avoid hurting the ones that are around them. For friends and family, it can be hard to
watch someone you love and care about, suffer from depression, and it can be difficult to
understand how to help those in what to do. Depression is a very selfish illness and what
I find that often people can push others away in order to protect them as a form of a safety
net. With depression, there is also feelings of
guilt and fear of letting people down. They may take things personally or say something
that is horrible but we don’t mean it. It can be hard to love and care for someone
with depression but standing by someone and showing them unconditional love and care is
one of the best things you can ever do for them. 4) Depression and being sad are not forever
the same thing. People with depression or any form of mental
illness do have a strong and intense fear of letting
people down as I said before earlier. Just standing there by them or for them and
being there for them is more than enough for them and that they will forever appreciate
it. Depression and sadness mean two different
things. Sadness is a normal emotion and if something
bad was to happen then you may feel sad, but that on the other hand,
sadness will lift after a few days. However, depression is a persistent sadness
-that it can last for weeks, months or even years. It can affect you in various ways such as
changing your personality, interests and the way you see the future. Depression I will quote again isn’t a choice
like every other form of mental illness that comes our way… 5) This one as said is” Depression isn’t a
choice”. The ones with depression didn’t choose to
be depressed. It can affect various things in your life
such as relationships, work, and education. They don’t choose to have a low mood all the
time and find everything an effort. Depression is out of our control that we can’t
do anything to stop it from happening to them. They aren’t weak because they have depression. What is weak isn’t asking for help or what
is weak is also basically maybe just trying their hardest not to dwell on it for too long
until they’re ruminating in their thoughts that tend to lead to suicidal thoughts and
so on and so forth. So, therefore basically, you know, we need
to basically understand this. 6) We can feel like a burden and that we’re
too much to deal with undefined Depression can cause people to feel like an
inconvenience to others, leading us to become feeling isolated again and finding it difficult
to talk to others. We can then sometimes feel that we’re too
much to deal with and that they’re bringing others down with them. When feeling low we can avoid other people
in order to hide how we feel from their family and friends. This is when friends and family need to be
compassionate and reassure their loved ones that they’re not a burden to them. By letting us know that we can talk to you
about how we are feeling, we can gain a sense of safety, trust as well as support around
them. 7) Achievements that you see as small are
big to them. Achieving goals that they set for ourselves
makes us feel proud. Other people’s goals may be to get high grades
or get a job or sometimes just getting out of bed or talking to someone about how they’re
feeling is an achievement in itself for the ones that have depression. Be proud of them with the small tasks or goals
that were set for them when they achieve these goals. These achievements bring us a step closer
to recovery and someday we will be able to achieve bigger things, but for now, it’s about
putting one foot in front of the other and achieving little things to give us
that sense of accomplishment as you know gratitude for themselves. .As we know for many of us with mental illnesses
that recovery is a long process and part of the journey to make us feel better and
get better. This isn’t going to happen overnight just
to bear in mind but it will happen eventually with the right help and support from people
that are willing to support them and be there for them throughout all of this
and forever not leave them in the dark. There are different methods and techniques
that may help others to get better for example medications, talk therapy, exposure
therapy, exercise and so much more. They may just need time as well as people
being patient with them while they are going through their darkest moments. You can’t always rush some of the processes
such as getting out of bed in the morning as this is a no-no. Let them take it in their own pace. You can’t also just say wave a wand in front
of you and say “be gone depression, be gone anxiety etc.” Just remember that there’s no cure or fix
as this is just a part of their everyday life and this a matter of choice in how they are
going to manage to cope with it on the daily. 8) We can still have some good days. Biggest misconception for anyone with a mental
illness is that you can’t be or feel happy. That is far from it! You can’t have happy emotions and you can’t
be positive Again, far from it!. The ones with the mental illness are still
humans and that they may just see and feel the world a different way than we do. Sometimes, for some days for the ones with
depression that they feel more intense sadness than others around them. They aren’t always having bad days they can
still have a good day. They can still have days that are hard but
we can also have days when we feel okay and are able to do things on their own and being
able to accomplish these achievements, for example, wise as I shared before getting up
out of bed, talking on the phone to someone and whatever else. People think that depression is all about
having bad days. The truth of the matter is, moods fluctuate
quite a lot and on the good days we can feel like we are in control and that they can achieve
something, even just going out with a friend for a coffee just to talk to them. Depression is a mixture of good and bad days. The quote that is one of this is:
‘ Every day may not be good, but there is something good in every day.’ 9) We appreciate your kind words and how you’re
trying to help us. It can be really hard to know what to say
and what to do to help with the ones that have the mental illness. Sometimes offering some kind words can be
more helpful and more than enough and that they may not seem to appreciate it but they
really do. It can be hard for us to show feelings of
gratefulness but the kindness has shown really does mean a lot to them. We need to understand that people with a mental
illness don’t expect us to know or them to know what to say or do in the time of need. People with depression or any other form of
mental illness that they don’t expect you to understand it all but just knowing that
you’re going to be there for them is more than enough for them. People with mental illnesses don’t wish for
anyone to be negative, judgemental etc as they’ve got enough of it as everyone has their
bad days and bad emotions. 10) We’re trying our best to get through
it People have to work through this on the daily
of the ones with depression or what have you. Like anything else it’s a learning curve. Depression is something that is that it has
to be work through. I’ve also learned that recovery isn’t something
you choose once – you have to choose it over and over again as well as these other forms
of methods and techniques that worked for you to you know to cope with your everyday
needs. They can’t just let go and ignore depression,
it has to be treated appropriately by a medical professional. If we have to use therapy and/or medication
as a way of working through our depression please do stand by them. There’s no shame in asking for help. Depression can make us feel isolated and lonely
and sometimes having someone by their side can make them feel less alone. Sometimes, therapy may help some of us with
mental illness and sometimes not but don’t forever say to them in a tone that they must
go to therapy. Forcing someone to go into recovery will not
help as it may make the situation or feeling that they’re feeling worse off than they are. They will do “recover for you”
but then there will be the downfalls of a relapse like any mental illness however and
may it get worse than they were before. Let these ones with mental illness cope and
manage it in their own time, speed, pace etc and just let them know what they’re doing
that you feel isn’t quite right if they said something or done something to you or what
have you. Sometimes, some may need medication.Some may
not. But for the love of God no medication shaming. There’s no shame in seeking help because somedays
we do need to ask for help. 11) Last but not least – They can or may think
that they may feel that they are a burden to us and too much of a burden to deal with. People with depression may think that they
are an inconvenience to the ones that haven’t got it. This makes the person with depression feel
more isolated and feel more alone and it’s difficult for some to talk about it. The reasons are plenty and that they are for
the reasons are fear of judgment, fear of being laughed at, fear of being alone and
so on and so forth. But my advice here is to you guys is simple:for
the ones that have mental illness and what not for what they want to know is hopefully
that you will be there for them in the long haul regardless, be patient with them you
know and yes it is going to be a hard road for both of yous that one that hasn’t got
mental illness vs the one that does. Just be there for them regardless and let
them talk when they’re ready if they or they do feel like that they need someone to talk
to you know. Just also basically offer your sound advice
when they’re ready to like have you as a sound board for advice, don’t forever force your
advice on them until they are actually forever ready as a number one thing and also be empathetic
and walk in their shoes and actually you know love them for who they are not just for the
sake of their mental illness of depression or what other form of mental illness that
they are going through. They are still humans- you know that they
just still be loved and supported and what not and hopefully they can feel love and accepted
by you. So, this quickly ends basically, the video
of 11 things that people with depression wants to know. Smash the like, feel free to comment below,
feel free to share these videos around, feel free to follow me on the social medias that
will be listed above yas of the social media handles. In all further ado guys thanks for your support
and thanks for watching. #dowhatyoulovelovewhatyoudo. Until next time, I’ll see you all again soon. Ciao for now.

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