Are genital preferences discriminatory and rooted in transphobia?

Okay, hi there. My name is Kovu Kingsrod, and I uploaded a video yesterday. I actually ended up taking down after getting 4000 views and a lot of feedback I was given some more ideas on things that I could Express regarding the topic so I just decided to remake the whole video because it would just be easier that way so the topic is basically a discussion that’s been going on on YouTube for a really really long time people have a lot of different opinions on the topic and I just thought that I would share mine. So the topic is whether the genital preferences are discriminatory and transphobic and sexist or not, basically the question is if if a heterosexual cisgender woman does not want to date a Transgender man who hasn’t had gender reassignment surgery and um and he has a vagina if she doesn’t want to date him and sleep with him just because he has a vagina It’s that transphobic and this has gotten really heated and some people say like yes Definitely, it is transphobic because you don’t want to be with someone just because they are transgender and just because what’s in someone’s pants Though an argument that is very commonly used is That a homosexual man who doesn’t want to be with a transgender man Doesn’t want to be with that transgender man Because it doesn’t seem as a real man because he has a vagina or he may have a vagina People use the argument that people who don’t want to date transgender people don’t want to date them Because they don’t actually see them as the gender they identify as that society has Enforced these ideas of what a man and a woman should be and unless a man has a penis He’s not an actual man, and unless a woman doesn’t have a vagina and breasts she’s not an actual woman And that’s why people don’t want to date them because they don’t see them as, as the gender They identify as basically and they say that preferences are rooted in those ideas that penis equals man And that vagina equals woman and although, I must agree that yes that is the societal norm that it’s kind of what and one would expect if a baby is born with a vagina The baby’s brought up as a girl. Yeah, it is the societal norm but I think that when it comes to sexual attraction and preferences that lies in our biology and it has nothing to do with society then there would be no lesbians and no gay men because Society teaches us that that is wrong basically it is in our biology what we are programmed to like so a Heterosexual man is programmed to like women and vaginas because he wants to put his penis into a woman’s vagina to Make babies and that is reproductive sex And that is what really drives our sex drives at least that’s like the instincts that drive our sex drive although I’m not saying that’s always the case but it’s definitely the norm and There are more heterosexual people in the world and bisexual pansexual Homosexual asexual etcetera and basically, a point that I made in the other video that I ended up taking down Was something based on Something that we hear about for example We hear about these lesbian couples and one of them comes out as trans and that person transitions Into male and they get gender reassignment surgery and the other girl stayed By their side through their transition although they transitioned to the gender that they weren’t really attracted to at first I guess but they stayed by that person side because they love them for for who they were they loved them as a person and they didn’t care what gender they were because they just loved them and No matter what they look like on the outside no matter what kind of genitalia they had she loved them for them, and that sounds so great, and that’s that’s what you think that like true Love is. And based on that, I made a point in the other video that I believe that if a person really really loves someone they are able to look past the genitals so if a homosexual man is dating a transgender man who has not gender reassignment surgery so he still has a vagina the homosexual man if you really really love the transgender man will be able to look past the transgender man’s genitals and make love to that person because he loves him and he he won’t make love to the person’s like genitals because He would see that person as more than that, more than what’s in their pants But that isn’t always the case. I believe that human sexuality can be fluid and it can be bent like that We we have heard about stories like that, but the people who end up leaving the partners when they start transitioning They are painted as these Really really bad people and they are seen as shallow, and they are seen as As selfish because they are not staying by their partners side and supporting them in the transition And it’s really helped me personally to put myself in that position because I am bisexual I am like pansexual whatever so if I were with a partner and they decided to transition I would stay by their side but that is because I am attracted to both sexes I Can potentially be attracted to people of all genders It doesn’t really matter to me, and that’s how I experience my sexuality. I do believe that that’s also How a lot of trans people experience their sexuality not saying that that’s the case with all trans people of course but what we need to remember is that there are people who experience their sexuality as solely attracted to one thing as Strictly homosexual or strictly heterosexual and those people are seen as bad people Sometimes, because someone who identifies as a lesbian wouldn’t want to date someone with a penis Although that penis is attached to a woman and that lesbian is seen as transphobic They are seen as someone who doesn’t view that transgender woman with the penis as a real woman? but it lies in our biology, we can’t control what we are sexually attracted to a person can still respect a Transgender person they can still see them as the gender they identify as and fully fully respect their identity and Support them, they just aren’t attracted to their genitals. They aren’t sexually attracted to them. sexual repulsion is something that we cannot control But I completely get where trans people are coming from when they say that that stuff is hurtful And it’s really easy to think that person as a bad person saying you don’t want to be with me Just because of what’s in my pants. You’re transphobic if a homosexual man, just can’t get a boner seeing a pre-Transition Transgender man Because his body looks like a biological females That homosexual man just can’t it’s not his fault. He can’t control that. He may see that person as valid He may see that transgender boy as a boy fully, but he’s just not attracted to his body because that’s not what he’s programmed to like That’s not what he’s programmed to be sexually attracted to. I’m really really glad My eyes were opened a little bit because the feedback that I got yesterday because this is something that we need to understand but again I completely get where transgender people are coming from because if someone were to leave me just because of what’s in my pants It would hurt because that’s something that I can’t control I don’t want people to leave me because of something that isn’t in my control and something that I’m already dysphoric about. Something I’m anxious about talking about. Something I’m really scared of showing people. Something that I’m so insecure about. And when someone leaves just because of that it will hurt it would hurt really really bad But it’s just something we can’t control the situation sucks, but it’s just something that we can’t control and I feel like we need to grow to Understand where people are coming from when they just are unable to be attracted to someone. Again, they may respect their identity But they may just not be sexually attractive to them and most people have sexual needs they need the sexual needs fulfilled And that’s why they can’t be with someone because they aren’t sexually attracted to them it probably sucks for them as well Because if they really like them as a person I’m sure that they would like to be sexually attracted to them But they can’t control that that’s what you always say you can’t control who you are sexually attracted to it’s not another control You can’t choose to be gay you can’t to be straight? You can’t choose to be anything you can’t choose to be attracted to a certain genitalia Just because you don’t want to make the person that it is attached to feel bad because you don’t want to make them think too that you don’t see them as The Gender they identify as although they have the opposite genders opposite sex as Genitalia does that make sense and people just need to understand that people need to understand where the other party is coming from it’s an unfair situation and As a trans person I get it it really really hurts if someone leaves you because something you can’t control and something you’re insecure about But the person can’t control what they are but they are attracted to either some lesbian women are open to dating trans women They are open to dating girls, and they’re attracted to girls no matter what’s in their pants They just like femininity and that that’s cool with some other lesbians They just they are attracted to certain body parts And that’s valid as long as they respect the person’s identity that’s great but you can’t force yourself into liking something that you aren’t Biologically programmed to be sexually attracted to and the topic of transgender people these days is so so so Sensitive because if you reject someone you will be classified as transphobic Yes, there are people out there who don’t date transgender people just because they are transphobic They don’t see a man with a vagina as a real man And that is the reason why they don’t want to date them some people also hunt Transgender women or transgender men because they have a fetish and that’s also not good But there are people out there who don’t mean any harm They just they aren’t attracted to you, and we need to listen to each other we need to We need to give each other room to speak have sex with the people who you want to have sex with have sex with who you are attracted to See if you can be open to dating transgender people understand that transgender people aren’t weird. We’re not not strange we’re not gross Educate yourself and I believe that as People are getting more educated about what transgender is and stuff and as people are being more chill about sexuality and being gay and stuff like that and Then then people will after all become more open to dating transgender people But just some people just aren’t attracted to certain parts And they should be respected just as much as bisexual people should be respected People are walking around preaching about how everyone is valid but soon as someone says that they are solely attracted to one type of body because That’s just how they experience their sexuality they are seen as invalid And they are seen as a bad person And that’s not okay also to any fellow trans person out there Just because someone rejects you and you happen to be trans It doesn’t mean that they are doing that because you are trans I see how it’s easy to jump to conclusions and stuff like that But some people are genuinely nice people and they don’t mean any harm, and they don’t give a flying shit if you’re trans They just don’t like you as a person also, I think it’s important to not take offense so easily for example if you’re on a dating app and you don’t even know the Person you don’t have any connection to the person and they reject you Just because you have a penis you have a vagina And it’s just for like a random hookup you need to chill there is someone out there Who wants to have sex with you if that’s what you want? But like just be chill don’t freak out over everything I see how it’s easy because you can easily feel Dysphoric and feel like someone is against you or something because it is something that is kind of scary And we know that some people are against it, but that’s not the case with all people So we just really need to listen to each other that’s all I have to say for this video really and feel free to leave your opinion down below. Stay open-Minded stay respectful. Alright It’s okay to disagree on things just as long as we are, we stay respectful. And thank you so so so much for watching this video, if you liked it feel free to give a thumbs up. If you didn’t like it too much you can give it thumbs down Just let me know in the comments like give me some feedback and stuff for what I can do better in my next video Also, if you want me to talk about more topics like this and please let me know because it is really interested I learned a lot from it as well subscribe to see more my awkward little face And I hope you’re having a great day stay safe, eat, drink and do not hurt yourself and remember that you are worth so much more than you could ever realize seriously yeah, I hope you taking care of yourself and being kind to yourself and Being kind to everyone else as well alright. I love you Bye Okay, I’m done oh geez alright. Let’s see how this goes Also, I feel like it’s kind of appropriate to have like a naked woman on the wall, and you can see like her Yeah, okay

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