Canceling | ContraPoints


(quirky orchestral music) – Okay. Let’s get started. (groaning) I literally need a man. I need a man, help! All right, I’m gonna get
pliers, the lesbian solution. Okay. Let’s get started. (“Silent Night”) I love my king. This is not really the most
feminine moment for me, not really my 2020 vibe. But it does proportionize
my giant man hands. Nyew, nyew, nyew.
(tapping) All right, no one thinks
I’m cute, let’s get started. Okay, look, this video is about canceling, also known as cancel culture, formerly known as call-out culture. And I know you kids know all about this but before I dive in, I have to explain the basics to my fellow boomers. So listen up oldies, in the lingo of these young avocado-guzzling
smartphone addicts who killed Applebee’s,
canceling is online shaming, vilifying and ostracizing
of prominent members of a community by other
members of that community. Like so much internet slang, this use of the word canceling started
out on black Twitter where a few years ago
people, well, mostly women, would tweet “cancel R.
Kelly” and things like that. You know, it started out
as this vigilante strategy for bringing justice and accountability to powerful people who
previously had been immune to any consequences for their actions. For example, the Me Too movement promised to use social media shaming as a way to topple sexually abusive men in power who couldn’t be held
accountable in any other way. The promise of canceling
was that it was going to give power back to people who had none, and bring justice to prominent abusers. It’s, in a way, the 21st century version of the guillotine, the bringer of justice, the people’s avenger. But, also like the guillotine, it can become a sadistic
entertainment spectacle. And I wanna make the case that we do have, well, a teensy bit of a Reign of Terror situation
on our hands, gorg. Now there’s a version of this conversation that’s already been had to
death, and it goes like this. On the one side are a
bunch of male comedians who constantly bitch about
how cancel culture is out of control, you can’t joke
about anything anymore without these Millennial jackals trying to get you in trouble. And the other side is mostly
progressive think piece authors who argue that there’s no
such thing as cancel culture, it’s just that powerful people are finally being held
accountable for their actions and they can’t f*cking handle it so they go around bitching
about cancel culture. Now unfortunately, neither
of those viewpoints is quite as correct as
some people might hope. So, it’s a good thing I’m
here to deliver the truth. He didn’t know I was transgender. Story time, emotional, not click bait. Let’s start with an example. The most high-profile YouTube canceling of 2019 was the canceling
of James Charles. And again, I know you kids remember this, but (sigh) I have to
reheat ancient YouTube tea for the elders. Put the kettle on, Karen. So James Charles is a
20-year-old beauty guru, which means, boomers,
look there’s these people who make YouTube videos
teaching you how to do makeup. It’s worth checking out
if you can figure out how to start up Internet Explorer. I certainly can’t. t’s pretty bomb, it’s
lit, (clicks) it’s groovy, it’s fab, it’s far out, man,
(mystical sitar music) it’s a gas, I fully dig it. Free love, give peace a
chance, Nixon’s a fascist. So back in May of this
year, James’s colleague and mother figure, fellow
YouTube beauty guru, Tati Westbrook, uploaded a
40-minute video accusing James of endorsing a brand of hair vitamins that she, wait, that was a competitor of her brand of hair vitamins. An enthralling plot line, I know. And this was huge, this was
covered in the New York Times. But while Tati was at it,
almost as an afterthought to the hair vitamin dispute,
she also accused James of being a sexual predator.
(sinister music) Now I actually went back and checked Tati’s original deleted video. And she actually never uses
the phrase sexual predator. It’s funny, I remember
her calling him that because that became the story on Twitter. But what she actually said was, “James had tried to trick straight men “into thinking they’re gay.” – Oh my god, you tried
to trick a straight man into thinking he’s gay, yet again. – Which is pretty different from calling him a sexual predator. But see, this is what cancel culture does, it takes one story and transforms it into a significantly different story. You know, the headline I would write about the James and Tati story might read Tati Westbrook accuses James Charles of trying to trick straight
men into thinking they’re gay. But cancel culture transforms that story into the headline James Charles is a sexual predator.
(sinister music) Interesting, now, I wanna make it clear that my intention here is really not to defend James Charles. I’m not a James Charles stan. I’m a biological female in my 30s. Close to death, I know, please
leave a comment before I die. That said, I do think the statement, “James Charles is a sexual predator”, is a stretch, to say the least. At least, based on the information
I have in December, 2019. So, let’s analyze how this kind
of truth stretching happens. Cancel culture trope one,
(acoustic music) and you should be
writing this down, class, because this will be on the test. Cancel culture trope one,
presumption of guilt. There’s a traditional
understanding of justice according to which, before you
condemn or punish a person, you hear the accuser’s side of the story and the accused’s side of the story. You allow both sides to present evidence and only after everyone
involved has had a chance to make their case, do you pass judgment and punish the convict. (moaning) Punish me, king. Drinking this is punishment enough. Am I uncanceled yet, please. (laughs) You know in the United
States of… (groans) We legally have the
presumption of innocence. But canceling does not abide by the law. Canceling is a form of
vigilante mob justice. And a lot of times, an
accusation is proof enough. Now that’s basically the point of the progressive slogan believe victims. It’s a norm that was put into
place in progressive spaces because out in the world at large, people generally don’t believe victims. But I think it’s pretty
obvious how believe victims is a norm that’s easy to abuse. Was Tati really James’s victim? No, she’s not some
powerless woman abused by a prominent man in her industry. She’s on top of the industry and she wasn’t victimized by James at all. I see this case more as she weaponized cancel culture
against a business rival. Anyway, before James had even had a chance to respond to Tati’s accusation,
the story had already gone from Tati Westbrook accuses James Charles of trying to trick straight
men to James Charles tried to trick straight men, and from there, it was generalized into James Charles is toxic and manipulative, which brings us to cancel culture trope two, abstraction. Abstraction replaces the
specific concrete details of a claim with a more generic statement. In the transition from Tati
Westbrook accused James Charles of trying to trick straight men to James Charles is
toxic and manipulative, we’ve lost not only the sense of this being an unverified accusation, but we’ve also lost all
the specific details. James Charles is toxic and manipulative is an incredibly vague statement and may as well be James Charles is bad. But even without the presumption of guilt, if someone tells me
James Charles is accused of toxic and manipulative behavior, I’m gonna think oh,
that sounds pretty bad. And I’m gonna start speculating
about the specifics. And whatever my imagination comes up with is likely going to be worse than whatever he’s actually accused of. Also, the specific
accusation that he tried to trick straight men
into thinking they’re gay is self-evidently kind of questionable. How do you trick straight men
into thinking they’re gay. If you find out, let me know. It’s bad, I’m bad, I’m super bad. This is not a problem that straight men usually seem to have. At the very least, it
requires further explanation. It’s the kind of story that sounds like it has more than one side. So I’m immediately gonna
feel a little bit skeptical of the accusation, and I’m also gonna side eye Tati Westbrook because this accusation is setting off my homophobia detection alarm. (siren blaring) Leave the gays alone! But I’m not gonna have an opportunity to pick up on the potential homophobia and be skeptical of it,
if all I’ve heard about the situation is James Charles’s
toxic and manipulative. And I also want to point
out a linguistic shift that’s happening here. When the claim was James Charles tried to trick straight men, the verbs in the sentence were try and trick. So what we’re criticizing
here is James’s behavior, we’re criticizing things
he did, allegedly, trying to trick straight men. But once the claim
morphs into James Charles is toxic and manipulative, the verb in the sentence is is to
be, so these adjectives are characteristics of James, and it’s now not his
actions we’re criticizing, but his personality, his
toxicity, his manipulative-ness. This is what I’ll call cancel culture
trope three, essentialism. Essentialism is when
we go from criticizing a person’s actions to criticizing
the person themselves. We’re not just saying they did bad things, we’re saying they’re a bad person. And that’s what takes us
from James Charles tried to trick straight man to James
Charles is a sexual predator. So here, we’re targeting James himself, not just his actions, but
the type of person he is. A sexual predator.
(sinister music) And we’ve also really
escalated the accusation. Because I don’t know about you guys, but when I hear the
phrase sexual predator, the image that comes
to mind is a rapist or a child molester, maybe an abusive boss, not a teenage twink hung up on wanting to date straight guys. I mean, not that a person
like that couldn’t be a sexual predator, but
I really don’t think that he’s a sexual predator is a fair summary of the accusation. So this seems to me like a pretty nasty and dishonest twisting of the story, and it happened
instantaneously on Twitter. It totally dominated the conversation in a community of millions of
people for weeks in a few days. James had lost millions of subscribers and who knows what effect
it had on his personal life. Not that anyone’s seems to care. In fact, most people seemed
to be enjoying his downfall. He was a teenage millionaire,
a young, beautiful superstar. Easy to envy, easy to
resent, hard to relate to, hard to sympathize with. What was the point of
canceling James Charles? Did we want to teach him a lesson? Did we want him to learn from his mistakes and grow as a person? Imagine actually wanting someone to learn, imagine actually caring. My hunch is that the
average BeauTube viewer was not sincerely outraged and
hurt by their sincere belief that James Charles was a sexual predator. In other words, this was not
a case of triggered SJWs, this was a controversy
manufactured from the top by a handful of seemingly
vindictive and envious people. I honestly think that
most of the James Charles is a sexual predator crowd just wanted to bring him down a peg. Cancel culture trope four, pseudo-moralism or pseudo-intellectualism. If you look at the world we live in, would you say that people
are usually motivated by a sense of moral integrity
and intellectual rigor? No, maybe not. Let’s be real America, we are a bunch of morally impotent meatbags, constantly sh*tting ourselves
out of fear and lust. For Tati, calling out
James, this was really, it was about the hair vitamins, right? I think sis was super salty
that this millionaire kid, who she had supported and helped, had betrayed her by
endorsing a rival brand. And accusing him of trying to
trick straight men was just a twist of the knife. But moralism or intellectualism provide a phony pretext for the call-out. You can pretend you just want an apology, you can pretend you’re just
a concerned citizen who wants the person to improve. You can pretend you’re
simply offering up criticism, when what you’re really doing is attacking a person’s career and
reputation out of spite, envy, revenge, I mean, it
could be any motivation. Twitter viewed James
as an over-privileged, spoiled little brat,
and it was fun to wipe the smile off his smug face,
at least for a few weeks. It’s schadenfreude, right, this kind of petty sadism. Maybe not the internet’s
proudest moment but not the most shameful either. And that’s not to say that everyone canceling
James Charles was insincere. But there’s a world of difference
between cancel R. Kelly and cancel James Charles. And I’m interested to know
how these two things came to look the same.
(ominous music) When James was being canceled,
I remember being kind of transfixed by the sight of his life and career falling from
the sky, full tailspin, black smoke spewing out. A lot of my YouTube friends were like, “Lol, did you see James
Charles was canceled? “L-O-L-O-L-O-L-O-L.” But I looked up at
James and I said oh god, that’s gonna be me someday. Stay strong sister, don’t let
the bastards get you down. Let’s switch over to White
Claw, these are cute, these are fun, a little more
of a feminine moment for me. They didn’t even have these
last time I was an alcoholic. Not even wearing makeup. I don’t need make-up to serve
a full biological fantasy. (laughing) Keep drinking, people, we’re gonna make it through this together. So I was doing a little
Twitter archeology when I was looking into the James
Charles canceling and I found a bunch of tweets referencing
earlier James Charles scandals. “Y’all forgiving James Charles? “He’s still a transphobe. “Y’all are acting like
just because James Charles “has receipts, he’s no longer
a racist transphobe, like… “James Charles is racist,
ableist, transphobic “and a sexual predator. “A white woman, y’all are
being too harsh on him “and he’s uncanceled.” So according to Twitter,
James Charles is not only a sexual predator,
(sinister music) he’s also a racist and a transphobe. That sounds pretty serious. Let’s investigate. We’ll start with the
transphobia allegation. Cat girls of the jury, exhibit A. – So you’re not even full gay? – I mean, no, there have
been girls in the past that I thought were really beautiful. There’s also been trans
guys in the past too that I would really really
into for a moment in time. – And I oop. As they say on Twitter, yikes. This ain’t it chief.
(quirky jingling music) Friendly reminder that
this isn’t a good look. Maybe don’t be transphobic, disappointing. So James did f*ck up here. The problem is he’s suggesting
that being attracted to trans men makes him less gay, which implies that trans
men aren’t really men, which is at odds with the way trans men understand themselves. So this does deserve
criticism, no doubt, no doubt. However, what I see when I
look at this clip of James is not a dyed-in-the-wool
transphobic bigot, I see a very young person
who’s still working on understanding his own
sexuality and is trying to figure out where his attraction to trans men fits into that. And it seems to me that
the proportionate response to that situation is for
someone to take James aside and explain to him look,
here’s why what you said is hurtful to trans men and
here are some tips on how to avoid saying that kind
of thing in the future. You know, ignorance is not
the same thing as hatred. Not understanding someone is not the same as wanting them dead. Of course, there are
committed bigots who it’s just a waste of time to engage with, but sometimes just talking to
someone with a little patience and understanding is all it takes. But that’s not what cancel
culture does, oh no, we have to immediately
escalate every situation to the highest possible level of conflict. So by abstraction, we get James Charles made
transphobic comments. And by essentialism, we get
James Charles is a transphobe. We don’t give him a chance to reflect, we don’t give him an opportunity to learn, we go straight to branding him a bigot. Nonetheless, that same week,
James posted an apology to his Insta story saying, “Regardless of whatever
my intentions were, “that came across as me
saying I’m not fully gay “because I have been with a trans man “and that is absolutely,
first of all, not true, “like, that doesn’t make me not fully gay, “but that stereotype and implication “is really, really dangerous
and I’m very, very sorry. “If you are a trans man, you are a man. “If you’re a trans girl, you are a woman, “you are valid in your identity.” Could you ask for a better apology? Like he not only
apologizes for what he said but he also demonstrates
a clear understanding of why it was wrong. So does that mean people stopped
calling him a transphobe? Of course not. cancel culture trope five, no forgiveness. Cancelers will often dismiss
an apology as insincere, no matter how convincingly
written or delivered. And of course, an insincere
apology is further proof of what a machiavellian
psychopath you really are. Now sometimes, a good
apology will calm things down for a while, but the next
time there’s a scandal, the original accusation
will be raised again, as if you never apologized. And that’s what happened to James during the Tati scandal when
Twitter decided he was a transphobic sexual predator.
(sinister music) And that’s to say nothing of this racism I’ve been hearing about. Here are the receipts, exhibit B. In February, 2017, when
James was much less famous than he is now, he tweeted, “I can’t believe we’re
going to Africa today, “O-M-G, what if we get Ebola? “James we’re fine, we could have gotten “it at Chipotle last year.” Okay, well that’s a
little insensitive, maybe, but it’s not really something
an influencer should tweet. And fear of disease associated
with Africa, I mean, I can see how it’s in the
same vague conceptual area as certain racist tropes, but clearly, this was intended as a joke about his friend mistaking
Ebola for E.coli, right? And anyway, he did apologize saying, “As a white cis male, I
recognize my privilege “and would never want to
take that for granted. “But I f*cked up. “I feel awful for posting what I said. “I understand why what I said
was offensive and ignorant.” And James hasn’t made a
habit of making jokes like that ever since, so is this
one tweet from two years ago that he apologized for on
its own enough evidence for us to justify labeling him a racist? Well, according to cancel
culture, absolutely. Abstraction takes us from two years ago, James Charles made a joke
that referenced his fear of getting Ebola in Africa
to James Charles made a racist joke. And then essentialism takes us
to James Charles is a racist. (sighs) Look, I want to pause to
say I really do believe in social justice, at least as much as trash like me believes in anything. And believe me, I am
well aware that jokes, irony and even complaints
about cancel culture are often used by bigots
to cloak their real agenda. The Southern Poverty Law
Center even cited my video about how far-right
racists use jokes and memes and mockery of SJWs as a way to camouflage their hateful beliefs and make them more palatable
to a wider audience. So I’m coming at this from
a place of a genuine concern for anti-racism and anti-transphobia, as well as an awareness of the fact that cancel culture is often just a conservative red herring
used to shut down any and all complaints about
racism or transphobia. But I’ve also become very disillusioned with the way these
accusations are thrown around so frivolously on social media. By the way they’re used
to escalate conflict, instead of promote understanding. And by the way they’re
sometimes weaponized to destroy people who have made mistakes but who really don’t
deserve to be destroyed. Now, maybe you’re thinking destroyed, what do you mean destroyed? James is a 20 year old
millionaire on his way to owning his own makeup empire. And you are completely correct. If you’re James Charles,
if you’re a superstar, then being canceled most
likely does not destroy you. The cancelers blend into
the general backdrop of haters and they can set you back a few million subscribers and
a lot of emotional turmoil, but in the long run, they can’t
really touch your success. But here’s the thing, what
if you’re not James Charles? What if you’re a small creator? What if you can’t afford
public relations help? What if you belong to a
marginalized community and you rely on that
community for support? Well in that case, it’s
a whole different story. (muffled techno music) Let’s Irish up this coffee. (glugging) (ice sloshing) Shaken, not stirred. Spilled it all over my p*ssy. (groans) Mmm, that’s good. Booze and coffee is a good combination. I am feeling amped right
now, I am feeling hype. So this is the part in the
video where I should admit that I’m not just a casual observer here. At the time I’m making this video, sweaty, I’m super canceled. I try to make videos that are both informative
and entertaining. So in this video the
information is you get to learn about cancel
culture and the entertainment is you get to watch a worm
try to wriggle off a hook. (tongue pops) Let’s get started. Forgive me father, for I have
sinner, hey, how are you? God, I never wanted to be the kind of YouTuber who would resort to making videos about my own drama but things have gotten to a point, I feel like I can not
continue this channel until I spill some tea. So let’s get started. Okay first, a little backstory,
a little mise en scene. I’ve never talked about
this on my channel before so this is a super f*cking
vulnerable moment for me but I am, in fact, a transgender woman, which may come as a big shock to many of you since I’m 100% real fish. (tapping) I get comments all the time
from like very solemn people like guys, I’m pretty sure this is a dude. Okay, you’re a detective,
you’ve cracked the case. You’re doing very good,
sweetie, very, very good. But yes, as one of YouTube’s
leading B-list transgenders, I am a prime target for cancellation and I have been canceled many, many times. And we’re gonna talk about some of the things I’ve been
canceled for and some of the things I’ve been criticized for and the difference between
criticism and canceling, because yes, there is a difference. As we go along, I will admit
where I have made mistakes because despite how I look,
I am not a literal goddess and I will apologize where
I believe apologies are due. However, where I believe
that criticism of me is excessive or unwarranted,
I will not apologize, because here at ContraPoints Industries, we are not in the business
of serving bullsh*t. So the reason for my current
cancellation is, in summary, that in my last video Opulence, I cast transsexual p*rn star Buck Angel in the role of John Waters. And yes, it’s a much better story than the hair vitamin debacle. So notify the drama channels,
put in a good word for me, because sweetie, I’m not
here to make friends, I’m here to win. So basically I’m canceled
for collaborating with Buck Angel and a lot of trans people think Buck
Angel is a horrible person. And so my collaboration with Buck Angel is evidence that I too
am a horrible person. Cancel culture trope six, the transitive property of cancellation. Cancellation is infectious. If you associate with a canceled person, the cancellation rubs off. It’s like gonorrhea, except doxycycline won’t
save you this time, sweetie. Look, this whole incident
hinges, first of all, on whether Buck Angel is
in fact a horrible person. So who is Buck Angel? Well, he’s a trans man of
my parents’ generation. He grew up in a world where
there was not anything like the visibility and
access to information about transition we have today, and where there is a strict
medical gate keeping system in place for people who
wanted to transition. In fact, Buck was the first female to male patient his
doctor had ever treated. In the 2000s, he rose to
prominence as an adult performer, his gimmick at the time
being the man with a p*ssy. But he also became an activist. He wanted to create more
positive trans representation within the p*rn world, and from there, he became a more general educator and advocate for trans people. I first heard about him
in the early 2010s when I was doing some googling
about some little gender issues I was having myself,
although I ended up deciding to remain a female. And Buck was one of the
first female-to-male people I’d ever heard about. And he made an impact on me in part because you take one look at him and you think honey, that’s a man. But he was born a woman. (ominous music) You can do that? So it’s not that he inspired me to transition or anything,
it’s just it was one of many moments along my
whole entire gender journey. So I had positive feelings about Tranpa, that’s what he calls
himself, from back then, and then a few months ago
when I was feeling angry and miserable and
despised over another time I was being canceled by trans Twitter, we’ll get to that one
later, I saw this post from Buck on Instagram. “Dear beautiful human
being, I see your pain. “It is okay that you lash out at me. “You do this because I am you “and you are reflecting
your self hate to me. “I am strong and will be here “for you forever and no matter what. “This is my intention as a
human being, to help others.” “Love, Buck Angel.” And then the caption,
“Suffering, that is why “the trans community
lashes out at each other. “I am very aware of the hate towards me “by some in the community. “They hate on me and others
because they are hurt.” And those were exactly the words I needed to hear at that moment
so I commented a heart and then Buck DMed me and
he said, “I love you.” And I was like senpai noticed me, and so I said I love you back. Then when I was working on Opulence, I needed a voice actor to do a
line from John Waters’s book. And it was my co-director, Theryn, who suggested, “Don’t you
think Buck Angel sounds kind “of like John Waters?” And I said, “Well, he
just messaged me on Insta, “let’s see if he wants to do it.” And I just loved the
idea of having Buck Angel as John Waters in the video credits. Like a trans icon playing a gay icon. In my head it was just so, well, iconic. So I got in touch with Buck about the line and he was like yeah, I’d love to do it. So here it is, the 10
second voiceover clip that ruined a month of my life. – “One must remember,
there is such a thing “as good bad taste and bad bad taste. “to understand bad taste, one
must have very good taste.” – That’s it, children,
that’s why mommy’s canceled. Now I was aware at the time that trans Twitter hated Buck Angel. But my thinking was
well, trans Twitter kind of hates every trans celebrity
and they certainly hate me so I wasn’t gonna let that stop me. Little did I know quite how vicious things were about to get. Now, so far, I’ve been telling this story from my point
of view but I do want to give a fair and balanced account. So I want to pause and contextualize why some trans people hate Buck Angel so much, they’re willing to cancel anyone who
even associates with him. Basically, it all goes
back to this old debate in the trans community known
today in Tumblr lingo as truscum versus transtrenders. So truscum are trans people who distinguish between true trans people and fake trans people who
they call trenders or tucutes. Usually truscum think that what it is to be trans is to have a
lifelong struggle with dysphoria, to pursue a medical
transition involving hormones and surgery, and to socially re assimilate into your target binary
gender, so male or female. Anyone who is not that,
according to truscum, must either be a confused teenager, someone just trying to get attention, someone mistaking their
trauma or their fetish for being trans, in a word, a trender. So that’s a vig of transness that usually excludes non-binary people as well as people who don’t want to medically transition
for whatever reason, and for that reason, this view is sometimes also called trans medicalism, truscum obviously being the derogatory term for these people. So truscum are very hated by a lot of trans people because their viewpoint is that not all trans identities are valid. And Buck Angel is widely
perceived to be truscum. So the next question
to ask is is this true, is Buck Angel, in fact, truscum? Now my honest answer to that
question is I don’t know. He certainly said some things that sound like things truscum
say, I’ll give you that. A point he likes to make a lot is that he’s transsexual not transgender. And the difference between those terms is sometimes defined
as transsexual implies that you want to pursue
medical transition, so hormones and surgery, and
transgender doesn’t imply that. And people associate this I’m transsexual, not transgender thing with truscum because truscum often call
themselves transsexuals and say that anyone who isn’t a transsexual isn’t really trans. And often those people will be very mean to people they call trenders, especially certain
transmedicalist YouTubers like Vanessa LeBlanc and 2CuteSmasher9000. (laughs) 2CuteSmasher9000. Roast me back, Calvin, I dare you. (laughing) (dinging) But I think it’s important to keep in mind that the term truscum is a
product of the 2014 Tumblr wars, and trying to apply it to trans people of an older generation can
sometimes be misleading. Like when Buck Angel transitioned, the word transsexual was just
the word for his identity and he still identifies that way. So when younger trans people tell him it’s wrong to use the word transsexual, he feels like these ungrateful Millennials are invalidating his identity. And I do understand where
he’s coming from with that, but I also understand why a lot of non-binary people are
skeptical about Buck. Like he says again and
again, I’m transsexual, not transgender, like don’t
mix me up with those people. And that eagerness to separate himself from transgender people, it
comes across as hostility. Like I don’t think he’s ever actually said that non-binary people aren’t valid but I personally don’t like
that he seems like he wants to distance himself from them. And that’s my disagreement with Buck, it’s not that he invalidates
non-binary identities because I don’t really see him doing that, and if he was doing that,
I would have seen it, because for the last two months a lot of people have been doing nothing but sending me problematic
Buck Angel tweets. But as someone who cares a
lot about non-binary people and who loves the non-binary
people in my life, it does upset me when he
does this distancing thing and I hope he listens to this
criticism because I think it would be cool if he
got better about this. Of course, Buck is technically right that there are different
kinds of trans people. And I agree it’s
important that we can make those distinctions and talk about the differences when they’re relevant. But I also think that as a community, trans people benefit
from unity not division. Like if you have an employer who discriminates against trans people, they’re not gonna care
if you’re transsexual, transgender, non-binary
or gender non-conforming. They’re gonna discriminate
against you regardless. So we’re all in this together and there’s a lot of disagreements among
us and we often don’t get along so well, but politically I
think we should work together as much as possible instead of splitting into little factions because we share most of the same interests
and I think the best way to do that is to build bridges
instead of burning them. And that’s why I’m willing to work with people like Buck Angel who I have some disagreements with. It creates a connection, and
having that connection can lead to communication and build understanding. Also I need all the
connections I can get, gorg, I am very lonely.
(sad violin music) It’s not a joke, it’s true. Now I get that some people have views that are so harmful that giving them a platform is potentially dangerous. But in any case, I didn’t even give Buck a platform to share his opinions, I gave him a platform to be
a John Waters impersonator. A bunch of people on my sub-Reddit were like why couldn’t
she just get John Waters to do those lines? Well first of all, I
don’t actually know John but I just have a feeling
he would write me off as some kind of (beep) millennial SJW. Like why is Buck Angel
canceled but John Waters isn’t? Well, because trans Twitter
does not know who John Waters is and let’s try to keep it that way. I actually mentioned this to a friend of mine who knows John
and he told me that he and John have actually watched
Buck Angel’s p*rn together. So plot twist.
(sinister music) Okay, so trans Twitter
won’t forgive me unless I condemn Buck Angel as
truscum and apologize for ever working with him. But I’m not going to do that because I don’t think it would be the right thing to do, and doing it just to get myself uncanceled
would be cowardly. I’m happy to tell you
I absolutely disagree with Buck’s divisive rhetoric about transsexual versus transgender. I wish he would be an ally to the whole transgender
umbrella instead of trying to distance himself from the rest. And I’m happy to hear at the perspective of non-binary people who don’t trust him because I totally got
where they’re coming from and I think that’s valid. But I also respect the decades of good activism Buck Angel
has done for trans people and I am grateful to him for that. And in light of that, I’m
willing to give him the benefit of the doubt about where his heart is and express my criticism
in a more measured way than just attacking who
he is or the person. But Twitter needs to establish that he’s a horrible person because this is the strategy they’ve chosen to establish that I am a horrible person. And if the truscum allegation
isn’t strong enough to prove it, oh, they have other pieces of evidence to fall back on
to hold up their conclusion. For example, here’s a tweet claiming, “Natalie’s trying so f*cking
hard to make it sound like “the only thing Buck
Angel ever did was write “a few iffy tweets, and that’s just “so f*cking far from the truth. “Dude launched a targeted
tabloid harassment campaign, “outing a trans woman against her will, “with a specific intent
of causing her physical, “emotional and professional harm. “The shorter way of saying that is “that he wanted to make her suffer “and she very well
could have been killed.” Yikes, this ain’t it chief. Friendly reminder that
this isn’t a good look. Maybe don’t try to get trans
women killed, disappointing. It sounds pretty serious, let’s investigate.
(quirky mystery music) Here’s what I’ve managed
to piece together. Scene one, the year is 2003, Los Angeles, where the movie world, the p*rn world and the BDSM scene come together
in a tale of heartbreak, betrayal and transsexualism, La La Land. Dramatis personae, Buck
Angel, transsexual p*rn star. Ilsa Strix, dominatrix
then wife of Buck Angel. Lana Wachowski, wildly successful
director of The Matrix, at the time, not yet out
as a transgender woman. The synopsis is that Ilsa Strix and Buck Angel’s marriage ended after Ilsa had an affair with Lana Wachowski who was not yet out as trans. So Buck was understandably
upset about the affair and, in what seems like a petty act of revenge, told a series of magazines that this celebrity director Wachowski was a cross dresser who had
stolen his wife which, I guess, was the information
he had at the time. So is that outing a trans
woman against her will? Well, in retrospect it
seems like it though that may not be what he thought
he was doing at the time. But to really get to the bottom of this, we have to do some digging. We have to trawl through the dirty details of trans people’s personal
histories, which I’ve noticed is one of the Internet’s
favorite activities. So I actually went on eBay and I purchased Rolling Stone
issue 991, January 2006, and I’m finally able to reveal (drum rolling and intense music) that the seller canceled the order. Goddammit. But I was finally able to track down and translate a Spanish version of the Rolling Stone article
from the Wayback Machine, and I’m finally able to expose the truth. Stop, freeze exactly where you are. Take a look at yourself and what all of us have been doing
for the last 30 seconds. Who does this behavior remind you of? If your answer is social
justice advocates fighting for trans equality, you are incorrect. If your answer is creepy
stalkers who hate trans people… (bell ringing) I am very suspicious of anyone who’s online behavior prompts me to dig through articles full of dead names and sordid scandals involving trans people from almost two decades ago. This is very similar to techniques
used against trans people by internet fascists. So I’m pretty suspicious of anyone pushing this kind of investigation. How can you tell the difference between a trans-anarcho socialist
with an anime avatar and a Nazi pretending to be
a trans-anarcho socialist with an anime avatar? Well, you can’t. Anonymous is anonymous is anonymous, whether it’s on 4chan or Twitter. So unless Buck Angel, Ilsa
Strix or Lana Wachowski gets in touch with me and lets me know that for some unimaginable reason they want me to publicly dig up their
17-year old divorce drama this is none of my f*cking business. And it’s none of yours either. So shut up and go back to
Kiwi Farms where you belong. (pleasant ballroom music) (slurping) Let’s Irish up this tea. Doesn’t work as well with tea. So setting aside any tabloid drama that may have happened during
the Bush administration… (laughing) I’m saying this
is in the cuntiest way, and they deserve it. They f*cking deserve the cuntiness. I’m spilling whiskey tea all
over my goddamn bathroom. I’m a lady. she’s a woman. (coughs)
(pop music) The main argument against
me usually references a collage of Buck Angel’s
problematic tweets. And this is supposed to
be definitive evidence that he is a horrible
person, and therefore, that I am a horrible person
for collaborating with him. Well, here’s the thing though, a collage of problematic tweets
does not define a person. And I’m very used to being
defined that way myself. So I know how unfair it can be. Before I ever collaborated
with Buck Angel, a lot of people on Twitter were
already calling me truscum, that’s been going on
a year and a half now. And any time my name comes up on Twitter, a bunch of people respond
saying Natalie is truscum, Natalie’s a trans medicalist, Natalie hates non-binary people and you should really think what kind of message you’re sending to your trans and non-binary followers
by platforming her. And if the person defends me
or argues back in any way, they say I can’t believe you’re ignoring the valid concerns of marginalized people. You know, they’re weaponizing
their marginalized status as trans people to isolate and
attack another trans person. And sometimes this stuff
gets to my head too. I start asking myself wait,
am I a trans-medicalist? Do I really believe all these awful things they say I believe? But the answer is no, I just don’t. These things they’re saying
about me are 100% not true. You know, believe marginalized people is a norm that has encouraged
in leftist spaces for good reason, much like believe victims or believe women. And these norms were established to counterbalance the
mainstream tendency which is not to listen to marginalize people or to victims or to women,
but any norm can be abused. And the blunt fact of the matter is sometimes marginalized
people are wrong. Sometimes people calling
themselves victims are obscuring a more
complicated situation. And it’s even happened, once or twice, that a woman has lied. And the accusation that I’m
truscum is simply false. I mean first of all, I don’t even think of my own transgenderism
as a medical disorder, much less everyone else’s. I have of course collaborated
with Dr. Spiegel at all, but I will not have my artistry reduced to mere medicine.
(upbeat pop music) Second, this accusation that
I hate non-binary people is just no. No, no. My thinking about trans identity
has always been informed by non-binary people. I used to identify as
non-binary myself before I medically transitioned, and some of the closest people to me in my life today are non-binary trans people, some of whom are also transsexuals, incidentally, (laughs) it’s complicated. I’ve also made at least five
videos on this channel arguing for the validity of
non-binary gender identities, going back more than three years. So that’s five out of around 50 videos, or 10% of the content
I’ve made on this channel is about non-binary identity. A few months ago I even made a 30-minute video called Transtrenders, which uses character dialogue
to show what I think are the shortcomings of transmedicalism. But there’s still hundreds
of people on Twitter saying that I’m truscum who
hates non-binary people. And their main piece
of evidence for that is a collage of my problematic tweets. So let’s take a look at that. Here’s the three tweets that I usually see scrap booked
together as definitive proof that I hate non-binary people. This is the first one
from September, 2018. Notice how it’s taken out
of context from the thread so you can’t even see
what I’m talking about. “I’m sure this is not the
experience of many NBs.” NB means non-binary people. “I leave it to them to articulate “what NB existence looks
like in a binary world. “I do not and I can not speak for them. “But surely”, god, I used
to write like such a nerd, “But surely an account
that begins and ends “with I’m not a man
because I don’t identify “as one is pretty weak.” Okay, when I wrote the Twitter thread that that tweet has been clipped out of, I was defending myself from accusations that my most recent video, at the time, the aesthetic was anti non-binary. In that video there’s a character
named Justine who defends a version of the performativity
theory of gender. And basically I made this
video to express some angst I was feeling about the pressures of transitioning in the public eye. This was a very one year
on hormones moment for me and I’ve already moved on in my thinking. At that time I was very… My behavior must
(quirky music) be perfectly feminine at all times or else I’m not really a woman, my self-esteem is
totally based on sleeping with heterosexual men
who resemble my father. (buzzing) And anyone who knows anything about trans women knows that most of us go through a stage
like this at some point. And some YouTubers never
get out of it. (tongue pops) But personally, I mean these days, it doesn’t matter what I wear,
(sad violin music) it’s when I dream these dreams… (laughs) Dragging “The Danish Girl”. Well f*ck the Danish, I could never abide that sort of person. We all know what I’m talking about. You can tell the whisky is getting to me because I’m being
bigoted against the Danish. These things come out, you know? (cups clinking) You get honest, you get real when you get a little bit of the Irish in your system. Did I just f*cking put lipstick outside the f*cking lip liner? This is all Lily’s fault. Lili Elbe, f*ck her dreams. The point is when I was
making the aesthetic, I wasn’t even thinking
about non-binary people. And people will say that the
fact that not every video I make references non-binary
people is itself NB-phobic. As I’ve, said about one in 10 of my videos is about non-binary identity
but not all of them are and I feel entitled to make some videos that are just about trans women. But still some people
on Twitter were saying that the character Justine
is a transmedicalist. And because she maybe wins
the fictional debate in the video, I Natalie Wynn, am
therefore a transmedicalist. Here’s the thing though,
the performativity theory of gender, the one that
Justine defends in that video, is conceptually as far
away from transmedicalism as it is possible to be. Transmedicalism says that
trans identity is biological, it’s neurological, it’s hormonal, its diagnosable and treatable, whereas performativity says
that gender is gesture, it’s expression, it’s performance,
it’s a social phenomenon. Phenomenon, phenomenon,
phenomenon, phenomenon. Performativity makes no
reference to gender dysphoria or to any kind of medical concept at all. So whereas transmedicalism
is a kind of bioessentialism, performativity is a kind
of social constructionism. So these are exact opposite
theories of gender. Are you following along class? I’m not. (laughs) I’m ready to drink
Jameson Tea until I die. But some trans people felt invalidated by things Justine says in that video. And transmedicalism is another thing that makes them feel invalidated. So they decided that
Justine is a transmedicalist and therefore that I
am a trans medicalist. And this is literally just
bad media comprehension. Like it’s a failure to
plausibly interpret a video that some people did find
genuinely emotionally difficult. And so to the negative response to that video is just pure emotion. I always hear I don’t
care what you intended, trans people were hurt by that video. You hurt trans people. But here’s the thing,
just because you were hurt by content I made, doesn’t
mean that the content is bad or that I’m victimizing you in some way. I’ll give an example. I did a stream a couple years ago with a BDSM and kink activist. We were talking about various kinks and we got to DDLG which
is daddy dom, little girl, basically when consenting
adults role play age difference and the power dynamic
that comes with that. And me and this kink activists
were just casually discussing what DDLG is, what it isn’t,
when I noticed someone in the chat was starting
to totally freak out. They were typing in all caps
like my abuser used DDLG to justify raping me, why
are you defending my abuser? I can’t believe you’d betray me like this. Please stop taking my abuser’s side, please stop, I’m begging you. This was actually really f*cking upsetting to me because this person
was clearly in a lot of pain. They were having a panic attack because they were having
a trauma trigger reaction to this conversation. And I kept telling them
to leave the stream and take care of themselves
but they wouldn’t do it. So I had to block them and
then later get in touch and make sure they were okay. Now was there pain very real? Yes. Was it triggered by the
content I was streaming? Yes. But does that mean I did anything wrong? No. Is it wrong to talk about
kink in context where it’s clear you’re going
to be talking about kink? No. But when you produce
content online that’s going to be viewed by thousands
or millions of people, there’s always some people
out there who are going to be hurt by it. So if you want to argue that a tweet or a video I made is somehow immoral, I think you need more of an argument than just people were hurt. All right, back to the tweet. To this day, people
quote tweet the sentence, “But surely an account that begins “and ends with I’m not a
man because I don’t identify “as one is pretty weak.” And they claim this as
evidence that I’m truscum or that I think people have to prove their identities somehow, which is not at all what I
was saying in that thread. What I was saying is if
you’re trying to persuade a skeptic that trans identity is valid, simply saying I’m not a man
because I don’t identify as one isn’t a very good argument. Which it isn’t. I mean, no one has ever
been persuaded by that, so far as I’m aware. That said, I do now
disagree with the mindset I had when I tweeted this. Back then I still delusionally believed that it was possible to rationally explain why trans identity is valid. And I was simply looking for
a more persuasive argument than this is how I identify,
you have to believe me, no further questions. But I no longer believe there can be any rational justification
of gender identity. Which is another reason
I’m not a transmedicalist. Transmedicalism tries
to be a rational theory about why trans identity is valid, and I don’t think it succeeds as that, I don’t think anything does. My current opinion about
this is that I’m not a man because I don’t identify
as one is as good, or rather, as bad, an argument as any. You know, some things in life just can’t be rationally explained. Like love. Why do you love the person you love? Well, because you love them. You could write a poem about it or some gay sh*t like that, but you can’t give any actual arguments. And why am I a woman? (upbeat pop music)
Because I’m a woman. That’s it. I mean, I can describe my experiences and my feelings to you to
help you understand better but I can’t logically prove anything. And I’m super f*ckin
sorry if you can’t handle that mankind was set
adrift in an absurd world. That must be super f*cking hard for you. Tell me all about it. (bell rings) Next please. Okay, again we’re mid
thread with missing context but the tweet says, “Whereas
I’ve met 20 year olds “in full-on boy mode who are like hi, “I’m a trans woman, she-her pronouns.” So I guess by including this
tweet in the ContraPoints is problematic collage,
people are implying that I don’t think it’s valid for someone who presents male to identify as a woman and requests she-her pronouns. Well, that’s not true. I was surprised when I first experienced this but I think it’s valid, next. (bell rings) Okay, mid thread, no context once again. “But now you go into these
leftist discord/Facebook groups “and like 20 to 30% identify
as some flavor of trans, “most of them are not
conventional binary transsexuals. “That seems to be the future.” Okay well, it’s true that
many leftist discord servers are like this. But reading this back,
I don’t like the way the phrase conventional
binary transsexuals is hitting my ear. I can see how it could imply that non-binary identities
are somehow newfangled, which isn’t true. There’s been non-binary
people for longer than there’s been medical
transsexuals, in fact. So we’ll call this a bad tweet. I apologize for tweeting it and I apologize to any non-binary people who felt trivialized by it. (bell rings) Okay, this is the big one. This tweet got its own article
in the f*cking Guardian. You know, I really wish people
would pay less attention to the tweets I spend 30 seconds writing, and a little more attention
to the videos that I spend, you know, hundreds of hours making. (sighs) Anyway, let’s look at the tweet. This is the most scrutinized
paragraph I’ve ever written and it’s so mediocre. “This has happened to me
before in hyper woke spaces. “Like it’s me and a bunch of cis women “and we all have to go in
a circle saying she-her “because I’m there. “There’s this paradox where I can go “to a sports bar in North Carolina “and be miss-ma’amed
all night, no question. “But in self-consciously
trans inclusive spaces, “I have to explain my pronouns “and watch woke people awkwardly correct “themselves every time they say you guys. “I guess it’s good for
people who use they-them only “and want only gender-neutral language, “but it comes at the minor
expense of semi-passible transes “like me, and that’s super
f*cking hard for us.” So people interpreted this
tweet as me being against the practice of sharing pronouns, which I’m literally just not. Like I’ve actually been
the person who initiates the pronoun circle many times. The backstory of this tweet is basically that I once got triggered
in a situation where I was with a bunch of
cis women and we all had to go around saying our pronouns. And like a typical triggered (beep), I tiptoed over to Twitter,
to tip-top-type it out. But here’s the thing, by
the end of this thread, I had already talked myself away from the initial frustration I was expressing. If you know my videos and my voice, then you know me saying, “It
comes at the minor expense “of semi passible transes,
and that’s super f*cking hard “for us”, is sarcastic. It’s a minor expense. It’s not actually very hard
for us, gorg, it’s fine. (sighs) But people on
Twitter don’t watch my videos and they don’t get sarcasm. So people flipped out over this. I was getting dragged and
I made the poor decision to try to solve the tweet
problem with more tweeting, which 100% of the time is like trying to put out a fire with lighter fluid. So me and my dumb brain
did another short thread, trying to clarify what I was saying and defending my right to
talk about my own experiences. That didn’t make things any
better so in a state of anger and frustration, I tweeted
out yet another thread and this time I said
some truly stupid things, including the now-infamous line, “I sometimes feel like the last of “the old-school transsexuals.” I honestly don’t know what the f*ck I was even trying to say. I don’t feel like the last of
the old-school transsexuals, I don’t even know what that means. I guess I basically meant that, offline, I don’t have any radical aspirations. I want to be inconspicuous,
I want to blend in. And that’s what I meant by old school. I want people to assume my pronouns. It’s funny because it
is very different from the way I am online where I’m
totally shameless and open. I’m like sexual confession everybody, sexual confession, I have abnormal urges! (siren blaring) It’s 1:00 a.m. My neighbors can definitely hear that. They know I have abnormal urges now. They already knew that. But offline, I’m an inconspicuous p*ssy, like a total coward. So this was a rage thread and
I apologize for tweeting it. (bell chimes) (muffled pop music) (slurping) Let’s go back to Buck Angel. (sighs) I’m kind of a
conscientious objector to the practice of
condemning someone based on a collage of their worst
tweets taken out of context, but I definitely do
have anxiety about this. Like, I think I’m doing the right thing by not condemning Buck
as truscum and evil but, I mean, I could be wrong. What if I am basically sacrificing myself for the sake of a person who really is as bad as Twitter says. Maybe tomorrow he’ll tweet
f*ck non-binary people and then I’ll have f*cked up. (sighs) This whole thing is
incredibly stressful to me. But I do believe that by
refusing to participate in the anti-Buck Angel pile on, I am erring on the morally
safer side of things. Because even if he is a little truscummy, excommunicating him
from the trans community is still probably not the
best approach to take. In my experience, when
people accept binary but not non-binary trans people, it usually takes like a
30-minute conversation to win them over to some level
of non-binary acceptance. And I’ll give you a couple examples. The first time I was ever canceled, like totally trashed on
Twitter, was back in 2017, when I had not yet medically transitioned, and at the time, I
identified as non-binary. And at VidCon 2017, I met up
with a YouTuber named June who had made some videos
where she basically mocked the idea of non-binary people. And I posted a picture of
the brunch I had with June, and some other people but
let’s keep them out of it, and people on Twitter totally dragged me for being a peak liberal boot
licker who’s best friends with transphobic abusers. Christ, these f*cking people, man. This is so f*cking frustrating. And I’m not gonna claim
I changed June’s mind because I don’t know what
her thought process was but I did talk to her
about non-binary identity and she did remove her
anti non-binary videos. And I don’t have any
regrets about that brunch. (slurping) (glass shatters) (man screams) Example two, a couple months
later, I did a livestream with a conservative trans
woman YouTuber named um, what was her name? Sharon, Sharon, was it Sharon? I guess she’s just not
a very memorable person. Anyway, she had made some videos saying that non-binary identities aren’t real. But I gave her a chance
and she surprised me by being super compassionate
and thoughtful. By the end of that stream, she was pretty much totally
accepting of my identity. So again, the point is
not that I’m some kind of persuasive genius. If I was a persuasive genius, maybe I could talk myself
out of being canceled. The point is that sometimes
people who seem ignorant or hateful just need to be given a non-judgmental space to
learn and grow and think. And to just condemn them as hopeless bigots actually prevents that growth from happening. And Sharon, despite her totally
forgettable personality, turned out to be an
incredibly open-minded person. Like later on she actually
made an apology video to non-binary people and I
became good friends with her and we work together on most of the videos I’ve made this year. You know, until she ruined
my life by recommending a canceled John Waters impersonator. I guess the moral is never talk
to people you disagree with, it will only lead to pain. (gentle acoustic music) I do think there’s something
off with my hormone dose, like I’m crying three times a day. Oh, and I can’t cum
unless there’s vibrators in at least three of my holes. It happens like once a month,
there has to be a full moon. I honestly only still
bother because it numbs the pain for a few moments. What I’m trying to say is I really do believe in conversation which means hearing out
multiple perspectives. I don’t want my audience to get all their information about
trans people from me, and I think it’s important
to listen to criticism. So I encourage my audience to go watch some non-binary YouTubers who have criticized me and
criticized Buck Angel. For example, go check
out non-binary YouTuber, Lux Anders’s video about
me and non-binary YouTuber, Korviday’s video about Buck Angel. I think YouTube as a platform is better at producing criticism
rather than canceling. And I think that’s because,
at least in the vlog format, making a video forces you to confront the fact that you’re a human
being with a face and a name, who can be held accountable
for the things that you say. But people on Twitter,
it’s a different story. And I think it’s time we take a look at what canceling really is. I’ve given you enough context now for you to understand what
I’m about to show you, which is what I saw on
my timeline every day for nearly a month. All these tweets are from the aftermath of my uploading Opulence, two months ago, when the Buck Angel scandal first broke. And so I’m gonna hold my hands
now because this gets ugly. (gong rings) (laughs) “Hey, if any of you still
support ContraPoints “after her bigging up and collaborating “with notable TERF favorite
and truscum, Buck Angel, “you’re no friend to gender nonconforming, “non-passing and non-binary trans people. “F*ck her and f*ck her f*cking grift. “I am absolutely furious right now. “Weird how I’m 30 and
trans and managed not “to be a truscum, maybe I’m
just some kind of anomaly, “or maybe ContraPoints is a
conniving rat-f*cking kapo “who could do with a fully
wound backhand to the mouth. “Since I’m out of Twitter jail for now, “I just want to say f*ck ContraPoints, “her sycophantic stans and
all her BreadTube chums “who closed ranks to
protect her after she throws “the rest of the trans community
under the bus for profit. “Natalie Wynn is a f*cking grifter. “ContraPoints videos are now
just style over substance “so that explains why she
took to TERF ideology so well. “ContraPoints working with truscum “now definitively proves “that pretty much everyone
defending ContraPoints “just hates NBs and are also truscum, “legit gonna start on following peeps “that continue to follow
ContraPoints at this point. “Do note my wording of
pretty much everyone. “I know there are some that
were probably blindsided “by this somehow. “So long as you know that
ContraPoints is truscum, “you’re safe and cool. “Eat sh*t, Natalie. “For someone who used to
identify as gender-queer, “we expected more from you. “But I guess when your heads “this far up your own ass,
it’s hard to consider others. “ContraPoints, more like disappoints.” Oh, that’s a good one. If you’re gonna drag
me, at least be funny. “F*ck Buck Angel, f*ck ContraPoints, “f*ck any real transsexual. “F*ck your grift. “Here’s what hashtag ContraPoints
stans don’t understand. “If Natalie refuses to accept
that she has an apology “to make and continues profiting from it, “it will become our responsibility “to work on de-platforming her, “just like every other racist, sexist, “bigoted content creator. “No one has actually
suggested or attempted “to actually cancel her, but the longer “this goes on without an apology “and commitment to be better, the stronger “the case becomes for actively
working to de-platform her.” So in other words, no one
has suggested we cancel her but we should cancel her, great. “Can everyone finally agree “that ContraPoints belongs
directly inside a garbage can.” Here I am, sweetie. “ContraPoints collaborating
with Angel Buck…” Angel Buck, thanks for letting us all know that you had no idea who he even was until Twitter notified
you what to be outraged about. “ContraPoints collaborating
with Angel Buck, “a transmedicalist who
once outed a trans person “to try and destroy
them, and supporting him “because he looks and sounds
like a proper man isn’t “a small itty bitty, tipsy
topsy f*cking mistake. “This is a huge deal. “ContraPoints could be literally
collaborated with Hitler.” (bell chimes) We have a Hitler comparison. “Could be literally
collaborating with Hitler today “and y’all would be like oh well, “she’s just a little flawed, you know? “F*ck off.” “Can Natalie Wynn stop being a coward “and commit to being a trans-med, “it’s really tiring to watch
this happen every week. “Natalie Wynn is a
spoiled brat who refuses “to take accountability. “Anyone who supports Natalie Wynn “does not support non-binary people. “Natalie Wynn is such a
terrible person, my god. “Every cis and not non-binary person “who thought Natalie win
wasn’t trans-med now owes me “and every non-binary person $50. “Joe Biden has a better position on “the validity of non-binary
gender than ContraPoints. “My opinion is that
ContraPoints really sucks “a lot and I don’t like her. “I hate ContraPoints so goddamn
much, it’s unbelievable. “ContraPoints be like let’s
hate some non-binary people!” (laughs) This is a very
good impression of me. You’re doing very good, sweetie. You’re doing very, very good. “Buck Angel is a TERF apologizer, “boot licker and truscum. “Any association with him
must be seen as hostile “to the trans community as a whole, “let alone denial of non-binary existence. “That’s the line in the sand,
folks where do you stand? “And here we f*cking are dude, “Buck-f*cking-Angel on ContraPoints. “Eat my entire ass!” What, what? (laughing) “This is Natalie, Natalie
is a transmedicalist, “this is Natalie’s friend
Lindsey, Lindsey is a lefttuber. “Natalie and Lindsey are still friends “because Natalie and
Lindsey are both cowards. “Lefttube is a grift.” Oh, and they made me the man. The shade! “Issues that arose with (mumbles) being “in Contra’s new video. “Her video on turfs make no sense now. “Her video on transtrenders
make no sense now.” You know, if your interpretation of why I cast Buck Angel totally
contradicts the videos I spent hundreds of hours making, do you think maybe your
interpretation could be wrong? Apparently not. “Her apology is completely void, “sends a message that she
hates non-binary people. “She is reckless with her content. “Positive set arose from Buck Angel being “in Contra’s new video, “she has $400,000 this
month from Patreon.” 400,000, this number
is completely made-up. It is exponentially wrong. $400,000, $400,000 a month. “Odd take, ContraPoints
is the leftist PewDiePie. “Personally, I like to characterize her as “the Blair White Wolf in
leftist sheep’s clothing. “Reminder that ContraPoints is a piece “of sh*t who still has not apologized “for platforming truscum and
is actively taking their side. “Anyway, if you still
support ContraPoints, “get the hell away from me! “Pee pee, poo poo, I’m ContraPoints “and I can’t stop being a transmedicalist “and sh*tting myself
in public huh.” (moans) Valid criticisms of
marginalized people. (laughs) “F*ck ContraPoints, f*ck truscum. “ContraPoints is a truscum. “ContraPoints is a truscum. “ContraPoints is a truscum.
(clapping) “ContraPoints is a truscum. “ContraPoints is a truscum. You know, when you repeat the same f*cking sentence
over and over again, you don’t need to repeat
the same sentence over and over again…
(beeps) Actually doesn’t get more persuasive, in fact, it might get less persuasive because true things usually
only had to be said once. (tongue pops) “If you still support ContraPoints, “unfollow me immediately and
never interact with me again. “In conclusion, f*ck Natalie Wynn “and f*ck everything she has to say.” (sighs) (somber acoustic music) Okay, let’s get started. So that was just a sample of hundreds and hundreds of tweets. And all of this, let me remind you, is over a 10-second voice-over clip in a 48 minute video about a
completely unrelated topic. How do you work, how do you create, when a decision so trivial can become the main event for weeks of your life? And the tweets are just the beginning. After that there’s the Reddit threads and the YouTube comments AND
the Facebook discourse AND the medium posts, and the Newsweek article. Opulence is a video me
and Theryn spent hundreds of hours carefully piecing together. I think it’s my best video. And to have the response to
it completely overwhelmed by one minor casting
decision is heartbreaking and infuriating to me. And it’s left me with much less
energy to create new things. But here’s the thing, people on Twitter saying
mean things about me is not the worst of it, not even close. Like I’m a politically
opinionated trans woman who publicly transitioned while
making anti-fascist content on a notoriously right-wing
platform. (laughs) Sweaty, I am so used
to reading mean things about myself online, most of
you probably can’t even begin to imagine how used to it I am. And the way you psychologically
survive in that situation is you block the people on
platforms who are harassing you and you pay it no mind. But there’s some things you can’t block. And a big one is you can’t block people from going after your
friends and colleagues. And that is exactly what people did to me at the height of the Buck Angel incident. Lindsay Ellis, Olly from Philosophy Tube and Hbomberguy all got
inundated with tweets demanding that they publicly disown me, a person they’ve all been
friends with for years or else. In response to demands that she apologize, Lindsay released a
statement where she said, “I was not involved in Opulence. “My name was mentioned in it, “but I did not participate
in the production. “Therefore, with regards to
calls for me to apologize, “I have to ask, apologize for what? “There is only one logical answer, “apologize for being
friends with Natalie.” And here’s a response to her statement. “I don’t need to consider
you my f*cking friend “to disagree with beliefs
you knowingly solicit “or allow on your platform. “Same with Contra, it
just means you’re willing “to allow awful ideas
to fester for the sake “of financial gain which is fine, “but it makes you a piece of sh*t.” And here’s a comment at Hbomberguy. “I doubt that you were gonna read this, “but can you please just
tell us your thoughts on “that whole situation so
we could at least know “that you are on our side. “We don’t want to have
to cancel all of y’all “and cause BreadTube to go into a schism “as a result of this, thank you.” Nice YouTube channel you
(sad violin music) have there, friend. Would be a shame of someone
canceled it. (laughs) So f*cking sinister. Olly of Philosophy Tube released
his own statement affirming his support of non-binary
people, but adding, “Sadly I’ve also been
harassed, threatened, “doxxed, had my private life speculated on “and my loved ones insulted, “in recognizing the feelings
of those who kindly raised “their concerns in a polite way, “I do not wish to legitimize
the great many people “who use their hurt as a cover “for unacceptable toxic
and abusive behavior.” And here are some responses to Olly, “As a non-binary fan of yours, “I’m disappointed in this non-apology.” Again, what exactly is he
supposed to be apologizing for? Ever having associated with me? “Things we are going to criticize
Olly Philosophy Tube for, “being a sniveling
hypocritical piece of sh*t, “refusing to listen to trans people, “actively, openly and repeatedly mocking “the trans people he refuses to listen to. “Thanks for the apology, now
stop endorsing ContraPoints.” Now keep in mind that what
these Twitter people are doing is demanding that cis
people publicly condemn a trans woman for loosely associating with another trans person. Does that strike anyone else
as wildly inappropriate? Even Mia Mulder, a trans woman who has never publicly associated
with me got attacked because she tweeted a heart at Olly, you know, after he made the post discussing being
doxxed and threatened. And just for that, she
gets put on the enemy list. “I’m sad to say that Mia is on the list “of people that have stood by ContraPoints “as she had continued to be
a bigoted piece of sh*t.” To which Mia responds, “Stood
by ContraPoints, Jesus Christ. “No matter what I do, people call me out “and I’m not even related to the video “and I don’t even know Natalie!” The chain of guilt by association
is so long and twisted, I can barely even follow it. So they’re going after Mia,
(quirky mystery music) who tweeted a heart at Olly,
who failed to condemn me for my voice-over casting of Buck Angel, who was retweeted by a TERF. We’re only missing a couple of degrees of separation before
every living person on the planet Earth is canceled
over the Buck Angel situation. And several colleagues of mine, by the way, Lindsay, Harry, Olly, they all took a financial hit over this. They’ve all lost some Patreon support. One of the Lindsay’s former
supporters even demanded a $38 lifetime refund saying, “Dear Lindsay, I’m sorry for being pushy, “but I really am going
to be needing a refund. “I gave money to your
operation under the pretense “that you wouldn’t do
anything morally objectionable “and supporting
ContraPoints and blaming us “for taking issue with thought is, “in my opinion, amoral. “Please respond.” I hope she sent it to them in pennies. So look, I’m very
grateful to my colleagues for sticking by me through all this, but I’m also aware that
I’m becoming a burden to anyone who associates with me. I have no collaborators in this video. I’m working on this totally
alone because I’m aware of how radioactive I am right now, and I don’t want to
contaminate anyone else. During the height of this
most recent canceling, a creator I admire DMd me to let me know, “I cut the shout-out
to you in my last video “because I was nervous to draw
the ire of your detractors, “who are getting genuinely scary. “But I wouldn’t want you to
think I was disavowing you, “regardless of how many
people are asking me to.” Jesus Christ. The situation here is that
any cis person who defends me, or even associates with me in any way, will be labeled a transphobe. Any binary trans person
who associates with me will be branded an NB-phobe. And any non-binary people
who associate with me will be ostracized from
their own community. So on the Internet I find
myself increasingly alone. I’m isolated by the harassment. And that is ultimately the point, to exile me from my
community, from any community. And it’s all because I
refuse to participate in doing exactly that to Buck Angel. My experiences have
made me so disillusioned with the idea that social
media call-outs can lead to any kind of justice, that I’ve essentially sworn
off participating in them. There’s a fairly prominent
figure in leftist politics who I could absolutely hashtag-Me-Too, but I’m never gonna do it
because I have no faith left in the process of call
out vigilante justice. And I’m not saying I’m totally
against Me-Tooing people, because I think, in some cases, it totally is the brave
and admirable thing to do. But in my case, I feel like
I just know too much about the dark side of social
media shaming to ever want to participate in it again. I feel like the story would
end up being taken out of my control, warped
and twisted in all kinds of unpredictable ways. It would end up just haunting both me and the person I’d be
accusing which, in this case, honestly, neither of us deserves. So I’m just not willing to take that risk, except maybe in some
very extreme situation which this just isn’t, it’s not worth it. And likewise, when a mob
is at my doorstep demanding I condemn Buck Angel to save
myself from cancellation, no! I’m just not gonna do that. I’m a conscientious objector. I’m willing to go to
Twitter jail for this. Take me away, boys. (somber piano music) (groans) If there’s one thing I can’t
stand it’s BreadTube videos. Part eight and a half, the philosophy of being f*cked in the ass. (groans) I have done this
to YouTube and I’m sorry. So look, canceling is not criticism. It is not holding someone accountable. It is an attack on a human being. In this video I used
the word canceling more or less synonymously with
what feminist, Jo Freeman, author of the “Bitch
Manifesto”. calls trashing. And I’ve linked her essay, Trashing: The Dark Side of
Sisterhood, in the description. It was originally published
in Ms. Magazine in 1976, but it is a perfect description of what goes on on trans Twitter today. “It is not disagreement,
it is not conflict, “it is not opposition. “These are perfectly
ordinary phenomena which, “when engaged in mutually,
honestly and not excessively, “are necessary to keep an organism “or organization healthy and active. “Trashing is a particularly vicious form “of character assassination which amounts “to psychological rape. “It is manipulative,
dishonest and excessive. “It is occasionally
disguised by the rhetoric “of honest conflict, or
covered up by denying “that any disapproval exists at all. “But it is not done to
expose disagreements “or resolve differences. “It is done to disparage and destroy. “Whatever methods are
used, trashing involves “a violation of one’s integrity, “a declaration of one’s worthlessness, “and an impugning of one’s motives. “In effect, what is attacked
is not one’s actions, “or one’s ideas but one’s self.” And that’s what distinguishes trashing, bullying or abuse from criticism
or holding accountable. Criticism attacks your actions or beliefs. But when people are canceling me, they’re not bringing up
my problematic tweets because they want me to revise my beliefs. No, what they’re doing
is accumulating evidence to support the case
they’ve decided to make that I am a horrible
person who must be shunned. The only sense in which I
am, as they like to say, the new Blair White, is that I think I actually have now
snatched Vanessa’s crown as the most hated tran on tran Twitter. (laughs) Vanessa, I’m
trying to feud with you. Feud with me, goddamnit. You can’t have a one-sided feud. I don’t want to be one
of those trans YouTubers that just drags other trans people all day and they never respond. That would be really pathetic. The new Laci Green, that’s the other one. The newest in a series
of women you’ve decided to treat like supervillains. Maybe reflect on that
habit a little bit, hmm? And supervillain is the right
word, like I’m the bad guy. Duh, I’m the enemy. And what do you do with the enemy? Well, you disavow, disown,
deplatform and destroy. As that one tweet put
it, “That’s the line in “the sand, folks, where do you stand?” If you adequately demonstrate
your searing hatred of Natalie Wynn, then,
“You’re safe and cool.” But if you don’t you’re on the wrong side of the line, sweaty, and
you two are now the enemy. Cancel culture trope seven, dualism. Certain ancient religions
teach their followers to understand the cosmos
as a struggle between light and dark, good and evil. And cancel culture does it
more or less the same thing. It’s binary thinking, people
are either good or they’re bad. And to add to that essentialism, if a person says or does a bad thing, we should interpret that
as the mask slipping, as a momentary glimpse of
their essential wickedness. And anyone who wants to remain
good had better be willing to publicly condemn anyone the
community has decided is bad. There really is something
dystopian about this, you have to be willing
to accuse other people to prove your own innocence. That’s the line in the sand,
folks, where do you stand? In the most extreme version of this, all bad people are equally bad. So collaborating with
truscum means you may as well be a truscum. And, of course, being
truscum is tantamount to being a TERF, and on trans Twitter, it is a known fact that TERFs are Nazis. And this implies that Nazis, TERFs, truscum, people who
associate with truscum, people who fail to condemn
people who associate with truscum, people who
offer emotional support to people who fail to
condemn people who associate with truscum, all of them
must be treated the same way. “Deplatform her just
like every other racist, “sexist, bigoted content creator. “A fully wound backhand to the mouth.” I recently read a book
by Sarah Schulman called “Conflict is Not Abuse: Overstating Harm, Community Responsibility
and the Duty of Repair”. Basically Schulman’s argument is that, in various contexts from
romantic relationships to community infighting
to international politics, the overstatement of harm
is used as a justification for cruelty and for escalating conflict. So for example, and this is
my example, not Schulman’s, TERFs fixate on the exaggerated danger that trans women supposedly
pose to cis women. And in very classic overstatement of harm, they’ll describe everything
they don’t like as rape. Trans women entering
women’s spaces is rape. Trans women existing,
Janice Raymond, is rape. And then they use that exaggerated harm as a justification to
retaliate against them, to dox, and harass, and shun. Well the same kind of logic is used to justify abusive behavior
within the trans community. The dualistic thinking, the essentialism, the pseudo-moralism. All of this allows people on Twitter to treat me in an obviously abusive way, all the while feeling like
they’re doing the right thing because they’re attacking the enemy. And I realize that some people will say that I’m the one who’s overstating
harm to evade criticism. Well look, you’ve seen the tweets, the furious demands for me to be exiled, the doxxing and threatening and ordering around of my colleagues, the attempts to isolate
me from my community, the attacks not on my actions
but on who I am as a person. There’s not really anything
ambiguous about this, it’s just abuse. But I don’t think it feels like abuse to the people who are doing it. They feel like they’re punching up because I’m a celebrity with a platform and lots of Twitter followers. And it’s true that I do
have more power than any of them individually. But as a collective, they
have a terrifying power that they don’t seem to be
aware of as individuals. As Jon Ronson, author of a great book on public shaming put it, “I suppose that when
shamings are delivered “like remotely administers
drone strikes nobody needs “to think about how ferocious
our collective power might be. “The snowflake never needs “to feel responsible for the avalanche.” And that’s how you get these situations where you have hundreds of
people endlessly bashing someone who’s already been knocked to the ground, and feeling all the while
like they’re punching up. You know, there’s actually
a kind of power in safety and anonymity and obscurity. And there are many ways that being a public figure makes
you really vulnerable. For example, you’re more
vulnerable to doxxing, stalking and harassment on a scale that most people probably
can’t even imagine. You’re vulnerable to having your reputation permanently degraded in a way that people who
are posting anonymously, or pseudonymously, are
pretty much invulnerable to. And a lot of the people
who are attacking me, they’re not pausing to self-reflect, they’re not holding themselves accountable for the consequences of their actions. They’re just venting
their unfiltered rage. But in response to these attacks, I, as a powerful person with a platform, I’m not allowed to react
like a human being. I’m not allowed to get angry. I’m not allowed to show pain. I’m not allowed to get defensive, I’m not allowed to lash out. All I’m allowed to do
is go totally numb on the inside as I try to
frantically calculate the ideal public relations response that pays due deference
to the valid concerns of these poor marginalized people, all the while ignoring the tsunami of verbal abuse that’s crashing over me. People on Twitter, they
don’t try to persuade me like I’m a human being. They order me around, they
tell me what to believe, they demand that I say exactly what they want me to say, or else. It’s extremely objectifying. They don’t treat me like a person with my own opinions and feelings. They treat me as this
brand of moral commodity to be consumed or denounced. And this is all terribly ironic because of the conflicting demand that creators be authentic all the time. One thing that always frustrates
me about these situations is there’s this demand that
you apologize instantly. And there’s this perception
that a fast apology is more sincere than a delayed one. But in fact, the opposite is true. It takes longer than a
couple hours to cool down, lower your defenses, listen, learn, grow, seriously reflect on
what you may have done or said that was wrong. That can take days or weeks or months. I had to do my October
AMA stream for Patreon, and at the beginning of the stream, I gave my emotional half-formed reaction to the Buck Angel situation. And some traitor on my
Patreon (scoffs) transcribed that part of the stream and
disseminated it on Twitter, just to instigate another
round of canceling. You’re not allowed a
chance to think or feel. And because supposedly the best thing to do from a PR perspective
is to apologize immediately, canceling produces a lot of
insincere bullsh*t apologies from people who haven’t,
in fact, learned anything. And I think most people are aware of that. In fact, I think the demand
for an apology itself is often insincere. If you’re being canceled,
rather than criticized, the line in the sand has been drawn. You and all your kin have
been declared the enemy. Apologize to Twitter. At this point, I may as
well apologize to 4chan. Dear 4chan,
(upbeat music) I am super f*cking sorry I called you thin-wristed
otaku sh*t weasels who like looking at
pictures of little girls. I have been trying to educate myself and learn from my mistakes, and I now realize that’s only 70% of you. Once you’re canceled,
(sad piano music) you can really do no right. If you apologize, the
apology will be declared a manipulative attempt to save face. And in fact, it will be used
as further evidence of what a Machiavellian psychopath you really are. If you try to explain or defend yourself, I mean, first of all, you will almost certainly
dig yourself in deeper. But even if you’re articulate and correct, you’ll still be seen as
unable to take criticism, and as ignoring the hurt
of marginalized people. And if you just goes silent, you’ll be seen as a coward
fleeing accountability, even though there’s lots of
reasons why you might go silent. Maybe you’re taking a few
days away from social media to try to cool down and think clearly. Or maybe you’re so
overwhelmed by the harassment that you’ve just shut down. (upbeat trumpet music) Let’s do shots. Who wants to do a shot with me? Do you want to do a shot with me? Let’s do a shot. (cork popping) The tequila shot is my favorite, I like the whole salt tequila-lime ritual. It’s just very satisfying to me. That’s the end of that bottle, okay. Let’s get started. (slurping) You feel warm right away,
you know that feeling where it’s like oh, hey,
how are you, happiness? Hey how are you, feeling
that life is worth to living? It’s a good moment. You’re like oh, this is
okay, this is gonna be okay. I can get through. That’s how it starts, you
have to watch out for that. So look, I really don’t
like to represent myself as a victim. That’s not really a narrative
that I identify with. But for the purposes of communicating what effect canceling has, I feel like I should say
something about the pain. Much of the happiness
that you might expect to come along with success
has been taken away from me by this constant fury that surrounds me. Try to think about this rationally. I’m a Libra Sun Pisces Moon.
(twinkling) Being canceled is hell for me. I want to be liked by everyone. And I’m starting to think I might be in the wrong career for
that in a way. (laughs) In a way, leftist Twitter
finally accomplished what 4chan, Nazis, stalkers
and TERFs have been trying and failing to do to me for years. They’ve made Twitter into a platform so hostile to my existence
that I’ve decided to leave it forever. And they demoralized me to the point I could barely get out of bed for a month. And I know
(sad violin music) that sounds really melodramatic
but I’m just trying to be honest with you about
what a melodramatic person I am. I find I have trouble convincing people of the severity of the pain
that being canceled causes because I think it’s just hard to imagine if you haven’t been through it yourself. And I don’t know a more
succinct way to convey it to you than by telling you that, in the last few years I’ve
been harassed by Nazis, I’ve been harassed by TERFs, I’ve been stalked, I’ve been
doxxed, I’ve been threatened, I’ve been sexually assaulted. And the pain of being canceled, of being totally trashed by
other trans people online for years has been more difficult for me to cope with than all
the rest of it combined. Jo Freeman actually
describes how I feel better than I think I can describe it myself. “I was one of the first in the country, “perhaps the first in Chicago, “to have my character, my commitment, “and my very self attacked in
such a way by Movement women “that it left me torn and little pieces “and unable to function. “It took me years to
recover, and even today, “the wounds have not entirely healed. “This attack is accomplished
by making you feel “that your very existence
is inimical to the movement, “and that nothing can change
this short of ceasing to exist. “These feelings are reinforced
when you are isolated “from your friends as
they become convinced “that their association with
you is similarly inimical “to the movement and to themselves. “Any support of you will taint them. “Eventually all your colleagues join in in “a chorus of condemnation
which can not be silenced, “and you are reduced to a mere parody “of your previous self.” Yeah, that just about sums it up. Now, as it happens, I
am going to survive this because I have very deliberately built a support network that will
be there for me regardless of what online trans communities say. And I have very deliberately done that because early in my
transition back in 2017, I relied very heavily on the
online leftist trans community for all kinds of emotional support. When you’re early in transition,
I mean it just sucks. You feel like the whole
world is against you. And I talked about this a
little bit in my last video, feeling like a freak show
walking down the street. And even if you’re lucky enough
to have a supportive family, usually it still is gonna take
them a while to come around. At first they don’t
got it, they say things to you like aren’t you
worried you’ll regret this? And they struggle with
your name and pronouns, which is understandable,
but at the same time, it makes you feel like
you’re not being seen for who you are. So you need a kind of second family that understands how you’re feeling and acts happy about your transition, and validates your gender. And for the first couple
months of my transition, I found that in this world of
online transgender leftism. Well that didn’t last long
because well, I was what, two months into my transition when first I did an interview with the
Journal Is Jesse Single, and then I agreed to do a
debate with Theryn and Vanessa. So that’s a long story but in short, I associated with a string of people that trans Twitter considers the enemy. And trans Twitter tore me apart over this and it completely broke my heart because I was really leaning on, basically, emotional support from strangers online. Seems really stupid in retrospect. And after they turned
against me I decided, one, that I was never going to rely on this group of people again and, two, that I was going to have to
find acceptance elsewhere. And in retrospect, I think this
actually may have been good for me in a roundabout way
because I was kicked out of the safe space and I
dropped that mentality. And so basically I was
thrown into the deep end of reality and forced to sink or swim. And I don’t know if my
transition or my channel would be where they are
today if it hadn’t been for that trial by fire. Are we swimming through fire
or are we mixing metaphors? The point is I’m more armored
against canceling than I was two years ago. And the reason why is I have
acquired a certain level of privilege and security and independence from any one community. So that if one community cancels me, I still have somewhere else to go. The people who are most vulnerable to cancel culture are
not white guy comedians, they’re not James Charles, they’re not me, they are marginalized people who feel like they have nowhere else to go when they’re rejected
by their community. That means struggling trans people with a few hundred Twitter followers, it means a lot of sex workers, it means people who totally
rely on activist circles for emotional and material support. I’ll quote Jo Freeman one more time. “I had survived my youth
because I had never given anyone “or any group the right to judge me. “That right I had reserved to myself. “But the movement had seduced me “by its sweet promise of sisterhood. “It claimed to provide a haven from “the ravages of a sexist society, “a place where one would be understood. “It was my very need for
feminism and feminists “that made me vulnerable. “I gave the movement the right to judge me “because I trusted it. “And when it judged me worthless,
I accepted that judgment.” There’s a really irritating
point that people on the Left like to make that goes well, canceling doesn’t really
end anyone’s career. Canceled people usually get a
new job or keep their platform so I guess it’s not really that bad, huh? I think people say this
because they’re trying to mitigate any sense
of guilt they might feel about how they’re treating people. Because it’s a really stupid argument. There’s lots of things
that don’t end your life that are still terrible. But also, there’s cases where canceling has ended someone’s life. On December 5th, 2017, a p*rn star named August
Ames killed herself by hanging in a public
park after being canceled on Twitter over a homophobic tweet. On December 3rd she tweeted, “Whichever lady performer
is replacing me tomorrow “for Erotica X News, you’re shooting with “a guy who has shot gay
p*rn, just to let you know. “BS is all I can say”, shrug. “Do agents really not care
about who they’re representing? “LA Direct, I do my homework for my body.” So I’ve never worked in p*rn so I can’t really tell you what the norms are around women working with
men who have done gay p*rn. But the tweet certainly sounds homophobic to me and that seems to be the consensus of other industry people on Twitter. So Twitter did its thing, people in August’s community
called her a homophobe and lashed out at her. And as always happens,
plenty of passers-by jumped in to throw tomatoes at
the woman in the stocks. Over the next few days, August tweeted several
more times going through the usual stages that you go through when
you’re being canceled. First, she defended herself. She claimed most other women in the industry feel the same as her. Then she said she’s bisexual and therefore she couldn’t be homophobic. Then she said fine,
I’ll guess I’ll be fake and not have opinions then. Then she started bemoaning
how mean twitter is and she got really
defensive about her right to choose who she has sex with, and she latched out of
the people attacking her. And then, in her final tweet,
she just said, “F*ck y’all.” And went to the park that
night and killed herself. This is all so familiar to me, I feel like I’m able to relive with her each stage of
this emotional process. There’s that first moment when you realize the outrage is beginning and you get that sinking feeling in your stomach, and then the anger, feeling misunderstood, and then the bargaining, the fear, and finally the shame and the despair. And here’s the thing, I
totally agree with her critics that her tweet was bad. Of course she has the right
to say no for any reason, but she publicly expressed
this in a homophobic way. But she was still a person
who deserves to live. And I think there’s got to be a better way to deal with these situations than just trashing someone
until they kill themselves. And I know it’s never as simple as Twitter made her kill herself, there’s always other things
going on in the background. But the point I’m making is
canceling is more dangerous to marginalized people because
marginalized people generally have more things going
on in the background. John Watson did an investigative
podcast about her death, and it goes into how she was
sexually abused as a child, abandoned by her father. She was living with a
boyfriend she was kind of emotionally detached from. And a few weeks earlier she’d filmed a scene with a guy who
was unnecessarily rough and mean and who mistreated her, so she was kind of traumatized by that and so she was kind of on edge and really defensive about who she worked with when she was tweeting. Then the backlash happened and since she had no other support network, she probably felt like
the only community she had turned against her. And that’s a really painful feeling. She must have felt so despised. Which is how I have felt
for the last two months. I feel despised and burdensome. And I can imagine how a person who feels that way could have an
impulsive couple hours where they think their
best option is suicide. I mean, I can more than imagine it because I’ve been there myself. And I’m still here,
because at those moments, I’ve been with good friends
who took care of me. And by friends I do mean Xanax. (laughs) (banging) But I’ve also survived because there’s a lot of people on the internet
who’d be very entertained if I killed myself and I simply refused to give them the satisfaction. Oh no bitch, I intend to live as long as possible out of sheer spite. I mean, who needs a guardian
angel when you can make it through Christmas after Christmas on the fumes of total contempt? What I’m really trying to
say is Merry Christmas, you goddamn assholes! (“Hark! The Herald Angels Sing”) (crashes) ♪ Oh holy night, the stars
are brightly shining ♪ ♪ Meow, meow, meow, meow, meow,
meow, meow, meow, meow, meow ♪ I need to get my lesbian pliers out again. (cork pops) (“Silent Night”) Have a super f*cking happy new year, gorg. How am I gonna get this
bathtub out of my apartment? Anyone in Baltimore want a bathtub? Leave a comment if you want a bathtub. All right, I need to take
a deep breath because, let’s be honest, I’ve got one crack away from attacking my own Twitter
followers with an umbrella. I am about one breakdown
away from going on a rampage and making a
suit out of women’s skin. Just kidding, I would never do that. Though, on a bad skin day, I’ve given it serious consideration. Oh, I’ll be fine. I’ve gotta sober up anyway because I’m having more plastic
surgery in a couple days. And plastic surgery, that’s about the only thing holding me
together at this point. (laughing) YouTubing, this is a healthy
profession, this is great! Anyone want my job, step right up. All you have to do is make informative and entertaining videos about
extremely controversial topics while of course representing
the full range of experiences in the LGBTQIAA-plus spectrum
and being perfectly woke and irreverently funny. Well go on, I’m waiting to be entertained. Feed me mother. Oh don’t mind me, I’ll just sit back and pour another glass of wine. Oh, and I will, of course, be obsessively scrutinizing
every word you say for any hint of moral transgression, as well as critiquing your look, ya third-rate crossdresser. Zero out of 10, get off my stage. You successfully spilled
that everywhere, it’s good. (bell rings) (sighs) I do still want to talk
about why people cancel and the effect that it’s having but it looks like there’s gonna
have to be a part two, gorg, because I have hit my limit. So why don’t we all cut our losses and try again in 2020, hmm? I realize that people on Twitter
aren’t actually gonna watch this video, they’re just gonna make fun of the title and how long
it is, which fair enough, but they’re the ones whose
accusations against me are so numerous and convoluted, it required a feature-length
film to respond to. But yeah, they’re gonna see the title and they’re gonna transcribe
quotes out of context and they’re gonna say I’m
a fascist, I’m a TERF, I’m truscum, I’m the new Blair White, I’m the new Laci Green. I’m a cis bootlicker, I’m
an enlightened centrist. I’m a sh*t-Lib, I’m alt-right. I’m a heartless grifter raking in millions of dollars over the bodies
of dead trans women. Mask off, yikes, this ain’t it chief. Friendly reminder that
this isn’t a good look. Maybe don’t be a cis
bootlicker, disappointing. But they’re saying all
those things already so I’m inoculated. See, their mistake was
completely breaking my spirit, they should have left
a little piece intact. But it’s good, it’s good, it’s good, because basically my survival from here on out hinges on my ability to not care at all what
people say about me online. So here’s to not giving a f*ck. (Auld Lang Syne) – [Man] Happy new year, everybody! – This is almost a Norma Desmond cosplay. Which is good, because I’m
not gonna age gracefully and it’s the best to
get into character now. YouTube stars never die. (tongue pops)

About the author

Comments

  1. Finally got around to seeing this after a few months. Thought it was one of your best videos ever. Really made me think about how people (including me) interact with each other online and how we need to be better to each other. Hope you are feeling better emotionally.

  2. I’m a straight white cis male who’s terrified of expressing how much I love Contrapoints and how much her writing means to me. What do I do??

  3. You speak too much truth. That' why they killed Socrates. But as Galileo is fabled to have said, "And yet it moves." You are doing great, important work.

  4. I don't understand how an extremely vocal minority can even attempt to try to cancel anyone or anything. When a minority of people still support you, you definitely are not cancled. The easily offended idiots just need to realize, they arent shit.

  5. I heard about this channel from delving more into one of my favorite uploaders, Quinton Reviews. All this talk about being massive far left, extremely liberal. All the while ostracizing both the alt right and people who take an anti LGBT stance.

    So its a sub from me, because FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK those guys! I think I'm gonna love it here

  6. Wait wait wait wait, there's an entire faction of trans people, who's beliefs are "You can't be trans because you didn't suffer enough!!!"?? That's like those weirdo "gamers" who shit on anyone who doesn't play dark souls, or a boomer saying "Kids these days have it easy!"

    Now I'm a cis gendered white guy who LITERALLY just found this channel, but they sound REALLY nitpicky

  7. Someone needs to explain to me what is a transgender woman and how a transgender woman can be a biological female. I am 100% confused.

  8. 1:10:49 The important thing to remember, is that the people going around calling you or possibly other's all these kinds of phobe, are fucking NUTS

  9. 1:37:40 I know this advice doesn't mean-forgive my language-Bupkis to someone in a public position, but this mob attack mentality REALLY sounds like it's just coming from friggin kooks and nutjobs. And I've grown up in some pretty shitty neighborhoods in my life, and the one thing we learn right away is not to listen to the kooks. I see no line between the people calling you truscum and the guy on the corner with no pants and a tin foil hat screaming about the ghost of Abe Lincoln trying to fuck his sister.

    I'm not saying don't feel hurt-invalidation is a SHITTY practice-just wanted to point out where it's coming from

  10. So no idea if you read this or whatever, but you've been a bridge for me to even understand what's going on in modern progressive culture (because in internet dog years as a 40-something year old guy I'm somewhere around galapagos tortoise/redwood tree old). I've looked forward to your videos releasing and had been bummed out not to have seen one for a while. I had no idea the abuse you'd been suffering. I feel awful. I'm glad to have found your video, which the algorithm was apparently hiding from me. Anyway if you're looking for affirmation and people liking you. Well we like the heck out of you. My wife likes you. My 16 year old daughter likes you. You've done a ton to shape our worldview. You're important. You're smart. You're funny. This too shall pass. Hopefully this helps.

  11. I feel like the 30 minutes of reading out hate towards yourself on twitter was more-so you hurting yourself on camera than a poignant part of the video. In other words I hope you're okay after that

  12. Never has it seemed so evident that Twitter is for those who failed to escape high school. The thing is…it's not too late! Put down your phone and venture forth into the real world where adults talk to each other face to face. The moment you do so, you'll have earned your GED. From there the sky's the limit.

    It's not too late.

  13. I got confused and lost during all the Trans politics of this video. And I'm not proud to say that I feel alone and scared. 🙁

    I did love the whole hero's journey you made with scenery. It was pretty awesome.

  14. If one day, i win the Lottery, im going to donate you that 400 000$ so you can do a bunch of videos, enraging the crazies, saying stuff like ”yes, its all from patreon. I wonder what the poor folks are up to these days?” while sitting in a 10 grand chair, with a glass of bubbly.
    Love your videos and sorry to hear you are canceled. You will never be canceled in my heart 🙂

  15. one of my favorite books on history is the battle for Spain by Anthony beevor and one of the most important ans startling things about the entire book is how extreme language and reactionary behavior lead to all the civil wars genocides and so on in fact it got so bad there is really no way of not blaming everyone involved where they cleared out the rationalistic ideas and the communists used insane rhetoric that then fueled the nationalists into furious and violent responses. not that it justifies centrism its just a horrifying look at how when people jump to extremes in such a way it starts everyone down a dark path where the momentum leads to more victims more responses and so on.

  16. More people watched this video than Opulence, your like to dislike ratio in both videos is overwhelmingly positive, and there are thousands of comments about how great and helpful your work has been for them and their loved ones, yet you give almost two hours of your content to the Twitter people who are clearly not engaging in rational discourse.
    I don't understand why you care so much about all the negativity instead of focusing on the vast majority of people who really really like what you are doing. Don't be disheartened, what you do makes the world a little bit better.

  17. I look forward to your videos, and I think you seem like a smart, thoughtful person.

    Just hoping to counterbalance at least one crazy threat by a similarly faceless commenter.

  18. What if the people who canceled August were prosecuted for bullying her to death.. and since when is it not okay to choose who you have sex with?

  19. I think one of the best aspects of your videos is the compassion that you show for everyone, including people you disagree with or who have been mean to you. We can all learn from that. Hang in there, I love all your videos. As a trans women very early in my transition they help me feel so much better.

  20. So I'm pretty quiet on Twitter about trans people because I'm closeted, but I just want to make it clear that I've been following you and your videos for months (it took me a while to watch this one because of the length though) and I want to make it clear that I. LOVE. YOU. I've seen a lot of the arguments made online and I just don't buy it?? I generally agree with your statements and allow room for nuanced disagreements. Also, I got to speak individually with Buck Angel at my university alongside other trans students and after that, I just about fully support Tranpa and btw: he definitely supports nonbinary people, which he made clear when we met him. Sometimes the right can't be achieved through an online post – it takes talking to them in person or a film-length youtube video. ❤️

  21. I don’t normally comment on your vids (sorry) because I usually don’t have anything particularly original or funny to say (and I still don’t), but I just had to comment on this because it was EXCEPTIONAL, even by your standards. I’m aware of how much of an ass-kisser I’m sounding here but sod it – I will happily pucker up and kiss your glorious ass til my chapstick runs out because you are worth it! Every minute of this video was fantastic. I’m sorry you had to make it, but I’m glad that you did because it brings so much clarity, nuance, and empathy to the subject. I hope everyone who harassed you (or anyone else) sees this vid, and that it gives them pause to reflect on their actions. Take care of yourself girl ❤️

  22. I kinda figured there was a decent explanation for that fiasco, and was kinda weirded out by the over-reaction. I am glad that I never stopped supporting you on Patreon, but honestly kinda disappointed in myself for not standing up to my friends in defense of not being abusive and moral-panicky.

  23. Is it not somewhat ironic that these hate comments via twitter portray very binary thinking from folks proclaiming a non-binary identity?

  24. constantly i am reminded that some people don't think about (or perhaps know?) what "terf" means before they call people one

  25. Damn, woman did you worked alone on this video? IT IS AMAZINg, really amazing editing everywhere. I watched the whole thing and enjoyed it

  26. I'm NB and im really frustrated with other NB folks who think you're anti-NB, it's so silly. You're so obviously pro-NB and stuff and people who cancel you are just jumping on the hate bandwagon that people do so often with legit anything and everything it's so frustrating. im so sorry you're going through this, and you have my support 100%

  27. Ok so I’ve just watched, and I was straight and up LIED TO about your video?? I couldn’t be bothered to watch long videos back then, so I looked for summaries, and everybody was like “she doesn’t apologize for ANYTHING, she doesn’t explain” and so on, and that’s just not true. So, sorry for believing the fake vigilantes out there, and thank you for your great work

  28. Ok, watched the entire thing.
    I am not active on social media that much anymore and stopped making YT videos for similar reasons. I feel your pain.
    Peach also, btw. The insanity that is social media has been hard to deal with. BUT, I try to watch videos from time to time. Not many, but yours are always on my watch list.
    Its been a long time since we met and you have been friends with Peach forever, and its been a very long time since we spoke, but I still count you as a friend and I am proud to do sdo.

  29. I can't wait for working class voters to see these dramas and realise this is why they should put their faith in progressive movements again!
    Seriously, how can ordinary voters listen to leftist outrage about DEEPLY WORRYING CATASTROPHIC SOCIAL INEQUALITY when they do so with the same tune they chorused against something as minor as a fellow YouTuber's casting choices?

  30. i adore you endlessly, natalie! i hope you had a wonderful valentine’s day and i’m sorry for getting around to watching this so late <3

  31. Honestly, I was really scared of watching this video. I thought it was going to be you excusing or disregarding some of the legit criticisms some people have made

    But I'm only 20 minutes in and honestly thank god for this video holy shit. I'll be honest, I took a break of your content for a good while, and now rewatching and watching new stuff. I missed it. I missed your videos. I missed the ideals you put forth and how you talked through your thought processes.

    And, you hit the nail on the head. I feel like cancel culture is very similar (if not the same) as fandom purity culture. Where any type of fiction that falls "outside of moral culture" is shamed and spit on. Not even read or considered, or not even saying "Not my thing" and moving on.
    People get harassed, and baited, and basically tortured for the fact they explored a "not so moral" in FICTION of all places. That certain types of traumas and feelings explored in FICTION is shamed and hated on without a second thought.

    And its because of pseudo-moralism and pseudo-intecllulism, with barely any basis in data or research.

    Basically, I think even only 20 minutes in you handled the topic of "canceling" really well and got to the meat of what it was.And, Im really glad you made it.
    Thank you

  32. In all of this I find it ironic that lindsey Ellis gets flak from just knowing you but not when she literally insults neurodiverse people

  33. there's this book named "depth psychology and a new ethics" from the 60's about the social psychology of scapegoating. now canceling isn't exactly scapegoating, but things he describes there are so similar in nature to things you described it's pretty terifying.

  34. If someone is a trans person and spends their time actively trying to further trans-rights, they have to double-proofread all of their tweets for even the slightest troublesome-sounding language and still probably get dragged through the mud, whereas a cis-person who doesn't think about trans-rights can make way worse mistakes and no one cares.

    The mob goes after the activist not because the activist is worse than the regular cisperson but because the mob knows it can hurt the activist and no one will care what the mob says about the cis person. Transparently just a way to feel powerful.

  35. "And it's even happened, once or twice, that a woman has lied."

    Watching this in Feb. 2020 with the whole Johnny Depp & Amber Heard dustup – yeah, that aged very well. Well done, Miss Natalie. VERY well done.

  36. when women talk with cups of liquid it makes me nervous, sloshin around looking like its gonna spill all the time. Very distracting lol

  37. interteredasting and might i say that aside from all the sweet juicy drama that we're all here for the analysis of how the distortions of cancel culture occur is pretty interesting to me. i've been reflecting on the smears of Jeremy Corbyn in the UK press and they actually have much of the same dynamics; and it was establishment media funded by billionaires as well as twitterers in on the action too.

  38. I love you Natalie! I don't have twitter, and certainly never will now, but i feel like most ppl who have tweeted at you probably need to get a life. Cancel culture needs to be canceled and reserved for the real enemies NOT other LGBTQI+ folks

  39. It’s not a ContraPoints video if it doesn’t have;
    1. A great outfit
    2. Alcohol
    3. A shit ton of junk in the background

  40. Every system is perfectly designed to produce its observed outcomes.

    Twitter doesn't have a harassment problem – Twitter is a harassment engine.

  41. I heard you talk about how even supportive family can take a while to come around at the right time. I really needed that, oh my gosh. I’m staying with a supportive cousin and her husband, who is also supportive. They don’t understand. They use my deadname and misgender me all the time, and it hurts. Like, I even told my cousin “my name is [name]. I don’t even see [deadname] as my name anymore,” and she has only called me my name once since then. It’s tough.

  42. (Re: James Charles) This sounds a lot like when HR departments, families, police, etc. tell women to settle down because (insert reason why bad behavior wasn’t a big deal). It’s possible that Tati is morally bankrupt and James was using his wealth and fame to gaslight people into believing they wanted him sexually, and yes, that is predatory. No one’s trying to have him arrested, so the whole “I personally don’t see that as predatory” thing is just your opinion, and other people get one too.

  43. But the accusations of Tati over James weren't even accurate since he showed prints and lots of arguments and proof that it was a miss understanding and that she deleted the video cause she didn't even had proof to sustain what she was talking about him…

  44. I'm not sure how I stumbled upon your channel… that's not true, it was Reddit. I'm gonna keep this pretty broad, really if I could post this comment on all of your videos I would, because it's not really about this video. I started with this video and (I know you said not to) worked my way backwards, and holy shit, my brain is mush now. In a good way. I don't always agree with you, but you're so intelligent, funny and well spoken that I couldn't stop watching. You have definitely helped pull me, at least a little bit, out of my cis male, right leaning bubble. Thanks Natalie. Keep being you and keep doing what you're doing. You are helping people and I hope you're helping yourself. You are certainly not cancelled by me.

  45. Natalie, I’m an nb who never talks about being nb because of the bullshit around it. I don’t think you’re prejudiced. I do think your fame and the drag culture influence has dramatically worsened the quality of your content, and the “Hihowareyagorge gimme attention!” spiel does pollute your intentions, because it’s very hard to see sincerity in a narcissist. I don’t agree with the ignorant viciousness of twitter mobs, but I also think you’re sounding more and more out of touch because you now have a fan worship bubble. I don’t think you deserve the abuse, and I don’t like what your content has become. It now feels vapid. I hope you can rebalance style (persona?) and substance, and I hope twitter will get a fucking grip.

  46. 1:34:30 – "I intend to live as long as possible out of sheer spite" In this moment I related to a Youtuber in a way I never have before. This was my entire sentiment in 2014 , there were a lot of people who would have found a way to make my death about themselves and I refused to give them the satisfaction.
    YES YOU BEAUTIFUL, INTELLIGENT, STRONG QUEEN.

  47. There's only one scientific time that you can cancel someone.
    It's when you're having sex with your partner, you hear their breathing become quicker, shorter breaths you can tell they're getting ready to cum. So you go as deep as you can nibble their ear and just as they're about to cum you whisper: "ya cancelled"
    It's science really

  48. person: "why is this popular public figure so irrational"
    also person: "YoU sHiD yOuRsElF iN pUbLiC lOl"
    person who shares hatred of buck angel cameo: "YoU cAn'T bE fRiEnDs WiTh SoMeOnE wHo YoU dOn'T cOmPlEtElY aGrEe WiTh"
    interesting

  49. Thank you for your strength, your insight, and for your compassion. Your videos are a gift. I support and deeply appreciate you. I'm always cheering for you~!

  50. When ContraPoints said freeze! Look at what you're doing! I had to stop and look down and realize I had been holding my tit in my hand without thinking about it for the last 30 seconds lol

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