Overcoming Depression and Suicide – My Biggest Battle


what up guys welcome back to the fit men cook kitchen I’m just gonna dive right into today’s video because I’ll tell you
what this video has been in the works for quite some time it’s in response to
a video that I did recently on my Instagram story and it was about me
helping out a friend who was suffering from addiction the other reason I’m
doing this video guys is that I think it’s really important that we live in
our troops and we kind of recognize all those things about ourselves that that
make us who we are even than not so pretty things that people may not see
for me this video has been very difficult to do because I’ve often felt
a little bit hypocritical people think of me all the time as this happy person
and I would I was so fearful I was thinking like what if people don’t know
that I’m not always happy and even just hearing myself say that it’s completely
irrational thought because nobody is happy all the time
but also the reality of that is that I am a very happy person I love life I’d
love laughter I love seeing people happy at the same time I’ve got to admit to
y’all as well that I have struggled with depression my entire life so I recognize
that this video is not going to be for everyone today but my hope is that
through my level of transparency today we could have a greater conversation
about mental health and wellness and it can lead to less stigmatization and much
more communication about it I first noticed I think my parents even noticed
my struggles with depression early on maybe it was in middle school junior
high I felt sad more so than most I would quickly after school come home and
I would isolate myself in my room it was pretty bad in high school and I was able
to to mask it and keep it away from people because I wasn’t sure what people
would really understand it I was also embarrassed that was one of those
persons like I got I think I got wittiest in high school so I’m always
laughing and always like happy and go-lucky but I was also very sad college
was much easier for me because I was so busy but
have to really deal with my depression so and grad school is when it things
beginning to change for me I begin to feel a little bit different I wasn’t
feeling at my best more frequently I’d lost my job lost job offers I had broken
relationships friendships romantic ones nothing that seemed to work out I was
dealing with a lot of financial hardship and then I had to move back in with my
parents to save money because I didn’t have any money at the time and then I
ended up getting on welfare so I was not happy with Kevin at that at that point
of my life and so a lot of the depression that I felt was in fact
circumstantial but I knew that there was something much more significant because
I had felt that before my depression of my anxiety had gotten so bad at that
point that my poor judgment had gotten the best of me and I decided to do some
things that were very harmful to my health and so I had to be hospitalized
and watched by my parents for a couple hours I mean like 36 hours or so and I
just gone radio silent I was so picture trying to date and I had to send a
Crillon message after being gone for 36 hours straight and that responding and
so she thought I was lying she’s watching this video now she knows that I
actually wasn’t lying I was just being treated for for severe depression so I
got on some medication and started going to counseling on a regular basis and was
able to nurse myself back to health but nothing helped me more than eating
healthy and getting physically fit and that’s one of the larger reasons why I
started up fitmin cook besides wanting to lose the weight that I had gained
because of all the depression it was also so I could feel better I didn’t
like the way that I felt when I was on some of the medication and the
compounded effect of eating better and working out was doing wonders for my
serotonin levels and then when I would blog about it with the fitmin cook
community I would just put something out there on Instagram or put something out
there on tumblr and people from across the world would immediately just begin
to respond to me and write me and say hey that’s pretty cool
and it just did something to me kind of its kind of just woke me up and
feeling like my old self again I feel in time like I had us it’s a purpose so
fast-forward years later this is about two or three years ago between that
between the time frame I had still had my abs and flows with my depression and
things like that but I could start to pick up on a pattern and I would feel
much more depressed during the summer months and even though I could feel the
depression I could feel that the anxiety I was at that point where I was trying
to convince myself that I was okay I was trying to convince myself that I really
wasn’t struggling with it that everything that I had everything under
control and I was embarrassed because here I was Whitman cook I guess
telling people about healthy living and healthy eating and Here I am struggling
with this intense amount of sadness and depression in my mind I was thinking how
could I help somebody else that when I came and helped my own self out so I
remember even telling my girlfriend at the time about it I had mentioned it in
passing that wasn’t feeling so good and she said why don’t you just take some
medication I was living wrong with that and the pride in me was like no I don’t
need medication I don’t need this I’m good it’s funny I’m doing this on
YouTube but YouTube was one of the was a really big point of anxiety for me it
was really hard for me to even get in front of the camera and do any type of
video at the time so oftentimes that lag it wasn’t necessarily with my travel
schedule it was because I just was having anxiety and panic attacks so I
would shorten the intro a little bit because that’s all I had in me to get
through it without breaking down and getting really emotional so it got so
bad that one night I I did something to harm myself so it got so bad that one night I
seriously considered ending my life and I tried and then a friend found me so
this is the part that you don’t see himself
and needless to say that was a that was a rock-bottom moment for me again in my
life and it took me back to where I was when
I first started out with the hump with fitmin cook and being at that rock
bottom moment and needing like an absolution and I was disappointed in myself that I
thought that I was much disappointed that I thought I was better
stronger and I realized that I wasn’t in that I needed to make a change because got okay all right okay all right one of the main reasons why with seeing
the pinging that I was calling seeing the pain that
I was causing my parents in my family and friends the potential thing I’d be
struggling alone so it was one of those rough bita moments for me when I was
like it is you do have your own life and you can live your life but you also have
a responsibility to the people around you that your life really does matter
much more than you think I told myself that you need to get help
I set out again on this new path of discovery to get myself back again and
to feel better about Kevin and to kind of understand a little bit more about
this this depression I did get some medication and it was
mainly just for the anxiety and one of the things that I realized about myself
realized that when I was feeling really good and I was feeling it at my best is
that I always had a plan I did plan just like I took about meal prep go figure
so I could come back this in a much more strategic way and much more deliberate
way and be serious about it so two things first I’m gonna go over
the five things that I did in order to provide some structure to help me to
deal with my seasonal depression and the second thing I want to do is I want to
spend some time briefly I’m talking to people who have friends
or family members who have depression because I get some of your emails you
sometimes you don’t know what to say or do I’m gonna give you all some tips and
things that I’ve kind of learned along the way as well so okay so here are my
five things the first one is to be real about my feelings you’re not always
gonna feel at your best even for workouts so when you say and you
acknowledge it then you no longer carry the weight of trying to perform and
trying to hide it from everybody else it becomes real I have about you know a
handful of friends that I can call now to talk to them about it and here’s the
way a combination goes I’ll call my buddy on the phone and I’ll say hey man
just won’t let you know nothing is wrong but I’m just not feeling at my best
right now I just wanted to let you know that I’m not thinking about harming
myself at all but I just wanted to recognize that you know what today was
not a good day and I want to let you know and either we
can have a conversation about it if I want to or oftentimes it’ll be like okay
cool thank you for letting me know let me know why don’t we go and grab some
lunch or why don’t we go and do brunch on this day I’m gonna pray for you not
hiding it there’s so much power in that in the same vein I would also tell you
in terms of not hiding your true feelings is to go and seek professional
counseling professional help some of us may need some medication some people and
may not all the time you just need to talk through some of those things
counseling has been somewhat stigmatized as something that you do whenever you
have a real problem counseling is good for everybody
even if you are a hundred percent and you’re feeling at your best I would
still say go to counseling and just to talk things through they can help you to
process your emotions and to deal with all your bottled up energy all that all
that anxiety and much more productive and healthy ways number two is to get
active and get rest the idea here was just doing something that made me get up
every single morning that I had something to go ahead and do I joined a
spin class at like 5:45 a.m. I would go and get a workout partner so I’d have to
meet him at the gym at a certain hour coincidentally it’s max my dog because I
have to get up out of my bed to go take him downstairs to use the bathroom but
it’s great because then that leads to a morning walk and the latter part of that
is to get rest you need to establish a nightly routine so that way whenever
it’s time to go to bed that you are doing certain things to get you ready to
go to bed turning off the tea it’s playing some soft music lighting a
candle create a routine that invites and rest and invites peace into your home so
that way you can get the rest that you need one of the largest contributing
factors to continued depression and anxiety is lack of adequate rest number
3 is probably my favorite one is it’s called my rule of three I write down
three things that I have to do that day these things are actionable they don’t
require too much effort but are things that I really need to get done just
three things and if I get two of them I still celebrate that it’s really
important that you celebrate yourself getting those things done getting up and
grooming yourself brushing your teeth showering going and getting the mail
responding to emails from people the sense of accomplishment that you get
from that it really does motivate you to start doing more and one task could be
you sending out a message to all your friends and letting them to brunch and
proactively trying to get people together because oftentimes when you are
depressed you tend to isolate yourself a lot more so that is one other positive
thing thing that you could do number four is to set a realistic goal and to
put up reminders of that goal one thing that you don’t know about me is that I
really do struggle with a lot of binge eating at night time particularly when
I’m when I’m anxious I can easily eat an entire jar of nut butter or half a tub
butter I was trying to stuff myself so that way I would just pass out
because again I was that anxious the way this race to the goal is that I would
set a realistic fitness goal so whether it’s a race or it’s it’s a photo shoot
that I’ve got to go ahead and do I could see how my individual actions were
actually Purpose Driven so I’m not gonna go and binge at night time because I
have this race coming up and I would put a reminder of the race on the fridge I
put it where I need to be reminded so now whenever I have the munchies I will
have like some oiled eggs that are in the fridge that I can snack on I have to
buy some kind of cheese and eat that with it was a little bit of berry so in
full disclosure when I’m not feeling at my best
I do remove those foods from the house so that way I’m not distracted and I’m
not medicating myself through food number five is to speak well of yourself
and to speak well to yourself oftentimes the biggest troll in our life is the
voice in her head my assistant she she laughs at me at
times that’s I’ve always done this regardless I think it’s funny I’d be
like look at me you accounting you are killing the game give and she’s like you
were your biggest cheerleader and that’s how it should be though so cheer for
yourself even when you don’t feel like it for some of us doing these five
things and maybe seeking that professional and help can be really
beneficial and to turn things around as fitmin cook I also got to tell you about
the compounded of thing you can pound the positive effect that eating healthy
and a regular exercise can have on your overall mental health and wellness how
we feel is often dictated by the foods we eat and how we take care of our
bodies so be sure that you’re pumping your body full of healthy food whenever
you eat healthy you actually feel better when you feel better your perception on
life your perception of your of yourself and your circumstances can also change
so really quickly guys I want to talk to the people who are maybe living with
somebody who has depression or they know somebody maybe it’s our close friend if
you’ve never experienced anxiety and depression before the first piece of
advice that I have for you is to educate yourself about mental health and
wellness it’s hard to really kind of wrap our hands around something as
simple as showering that should be an easy thing
to go ahead and do you can go check your mail when I tell you that it’s
debilitating for some people it’s completely debilitating so you need to
come to a place where you have a better understanding of and respect for mental
health and wellness so that way you can approach your loved one in the most
loving manner the more you educate yourself about mental health the more
inviting that you are to that person because they they feel a sense of
comfort with you don’t try and make them talk to you either if they want to talk
to you then they will talk to you just provide an open environment where they
can come and talk to you if they want to now it may seem counterintuitive but I
highly recommend anyone who is actually in a close relationship with somebody
who has depression counseling it can be a struggle to live with somebody that
has depression because you especially don’t quite let understand it and you
need to process some of your feelings and frustrations in a productive manner
too and also get some get some perspective on how you could better be a
support for that person one thing that the therapist had me do years here years
ago was to send a message to some of my close friends about my depression
because I was bottling out and she just thought it’d be a good idea this is not
all your friend you got to know who to share stuff with not everybody can
handle it and just because they can’t handle it including family members does
not mean that they are less of a friend or that they love you less it just means
that you need to be particular about the information that you share with
everybody so I told my friends a lot of me you know there told me this they’re
not gonna know how to respond but I got one of the best responses ever he
responds to me with the story and his story was I remember as a child coming
home one day after school seeing my dad huggable under a desk or
in the corner of the house and he was shaking he was crying and I didn’t know
what to do but I just kind of was just there for him and I helped him out it
happened a few times seven adolescents so yeah and he just shared that me
sitting that email was a very vulnerable moment because I’m putting myself out
there and he responded with something else that was really vulnerable to that
it was very personal and vulnerable to him and that stuck with me you don’t
have to overthink it sometimes just want to show you something that you know I
don’t know exactly what you’re struggling with but I had this story
that I wanted to share and that was dope I was really nice to all those out there
who have ever felt just a tinge of depression at all I invite you to share
a little bit of your wellness routine below how you deal with it how you cope
how you brighten your own day how you find sources of inspiration to keep
fighting people read the comments I read the comments and it’s just great to know
that there is hope and that you are not alone so if you are struggling with much
more harmful thoughts about yourself I’m gonna put a link below to a hotline that
you can call and get immediate help right away
because your life is way too important thank you for watching guys until next
time keep it healthy but of course what that’s right never ever boring

About the author

Comments

  1. It takes a lot of strength and courage to open up about something like this. I feel as if I can relate, understand and bond with you on an interpersonal level. I’m very happy for you, your achievements and the relationship you’re sharing with us. Thank you for sharing this, in a way we see the real you and even the happy people can fall victim to depression. I hope I can hug you one day and tell you that you’re worth more than you think and how many people you impact and bring hope and happiness to.

  2. Kevin, this video is so brave and will help so many. You’re story is powerful and your transparency is healing. Thank you for all you do!! Wishing you all the best.

  3. I have so much respect for you Kevin, getting back at it and trying to always make your life better. – Robin, The Netherlands

  4. Kevin, thank you for being authentic and real in this video. Everyone sees the highs but they come with lows. Thankful that you are here and that God has a bigger story for you to tell. Looking forward to seeing more from you and Fit Men Cook.

  5. Kevin this is amazing and I’m super proud of you for your transparency. I too deal with bipolar depression. I say deal with rather than struggle because struggle carries a negative vibe that isn’t productive in my opinion. We have a lot in common man and I’d love to have you as a guest on a monthly wellness call that I do. There’s one Monday 8-27 @9pm if you’re available. But regardless I encourage you to keep pushing and being transparent. I think the best thing we can do is share our stories for those that may be hesitant to share theirs. Maybe us speaking on it will encourage them to do the same! Great video and I hope to connect with you soon! God Bless!

  6. Thank you Kevin for that great message and testimony you shared. It brought me to tears. It opened up some memories of myself when I was younger dealing with my depression. I've gotten help and was medicated for a few months then got off the medicine because it was making me feel worst but my depression wasn't as severe. I received therapy for a few months which helped a little but I spoke with people that were involved in my life that helped me to get out of my darkness and into the light. After I actually took a step back and visualized the deep pain I put on my mother, brothers and sisters, that's when I knew how foolish my actions were trying to take my own life and how selfish that would have been to not give a chance for my son to grow up with his father. Thank you for your story. My depression comes back now and then but I know how to deal with it now and not make any drastic or harmful decisions to end myself. My son suffers with it now and I am trying to figure out ways on how I can help him and this video gave me the mental and nurturing tools to help him make it through as I did. Thank you brother….definitely needed to hear that.

  7. Wow! Thank you for this… I’m on your email list but wasn’t a subscriber. I believe everyone in my immediate family suffers from depression. One family member is in counseling but we all should be in counseling. Take care of yourself, please n thank you.

  8. Thank you so much for this video. I spent years dealing with depression. Being on the other side now my heart aches for you. Thank you for standing tall as a man and being vulnerable. Men aren’t always celebrated for these qualities but they are valuable nonetheless. As a man I celebrate you for being strong enough to share your struggles. Don’t give up.

  9. I can understand what you went through, I’ve been suffering from depression for so many years. But I was diagnosed with depression about 3years ago. But I’d always had it since I was a young child. My Anxiety comes and go… but I’ve change the way I think and change my lifestyle. It helps me a lot, stay busy. I never wanted to commit suicide – l love life . I don’t know – I do know what your feelings are. I’m glad your doing little better. God Bless you.

  10. I think your amazing!!!! Thank you for sharing and being so transparent. God is using you to bless others and I’m sure He is pleased.

  11. wow! thank you so much for being so real with this. i struggle so bad with anxiety. Thank God your friend found you, and I am so thankful your life didn't end! Your life is precious. Thank you for your videos and being so honest, you help me so much!

  12. Hello friends 🙂 if you want to get rid of Depression or any other Mental illnesses here's how ……Repentance of your Sins , NO I AM NOT INTO WORLDLY RELIGION, but I do know that mental illness are just evil spirits that are allow to attacks us Mentally and Physically ….I use to be into Worldly Religion but then I just stop going to church and believing, but threw Fear I started searching for the God that Created Us All , and I found him 🙂 and one day i heard someone say that Lord sent a Evil spirit to oppress King Saul >( Bible 1 Samuel 16:14) )because of his disobedience to God :-/ so if God sends Evil spirit on people then what am I'm doing wrong that God has put a Evil spirit on me that is Giving me Depression & Anxiety 🙁 SIN !! Practicing God Laws and your Depression will go away , but if you continue Practicing sin or Refusing to stop Sinning your are giving a open invitation for these Evil spirit to Torment you …..example> Just like in the Vampire Movies , the only way that a vampire can Enter into your House is that you have to Invite them in :-/ So when you are sinning you are inviting those Evil Spirit into your Body/ House to Torment you… NO RELIGION JUST TRUTH !!

  13. You are incredible, Kevin.

    When you spoke about that moment that nothing was going right – job loss, no job offers, moving in with parents, financial instability and welfare – it sounded like we were twins in experience. I am finally just now coming out of it and reintegrating but this video makes me even more ready and willing to get more DELIBERATE. I am reading again. I love reading. I prepped all of my fruits last night, cutting up my oranges. And I will be using your channel as a guide for meal prepping.

    I just thank you so much. I feel so much gratitude that you exist, you persist and you keep going. It tells me how much I want to live, to create a life for myself and to have patience for my journey. I will come back to THIS video to gain clarity when I feel rocky.

    Thank you.

  14. Hey brother thank you so much for this video…I'm 40 & just started treatment for my depression & feel the same way u feel on so many levels. I say to you brother keep ur head up stay focused on God like meal preap as ur videos are very inspirational to me & I'm sure many others. Stay strong

  15. Definitely been there, felt that. Depression isn't an easy thing to go through… It often feels like people look at you like, "you don't have cancer, so what's your problem?" But they don't realize that mental health is just as important as physical health, in fact they go hand in hand.. 🤔 thank God I found peace, no thanks to people though 🙄😑

    But for anyone on here who is depressed.. sad… Feeling alone… Suicidal or whatever.. I just want you to know that life will get better. People think it's cliché, but think the amount of crappy days you've had… But remember after those crappy days, came good days, laughing days, "OMGosh I think I won the lottery" 🤔🤷🏾‍♀️🙄 ok maybe not that… But lol, my point is, no matter how bad the days got you survived, you made it, you overcame!! Please don't give up. Please don't listen to the hurtful words of people. Try not to isolate yourself.. if you find it hard to make friends, the internet has made the world do small 🙋🏾‍♀️🤗 I'll be your friend!! Message me here on YouTube, or you can email me at [email protected] I'll respond 😘

    If you need a friend to talk to, to cry to, to pray for you, to give you advice- I'm no counsellor, but I'll be your friend 💖 I don't know you, but I want you to know you're beautiful/ handsome. Your life means so much. I'm rooting for you 💝🙏🏾👊🏾 God bless

  16. Hey Kevin! I knew you were intelligent and talented and now we all get to cherish you for your bravery. What a man! 💚💛💜NOTHING but love and the utmost respect for you. ~natasha~

  17. Kevin- you have an such immense light and kindness in your spirit that the enemy was trying to drown it out in darkness! You have a great purpose that will impact many lives, do not believe the lies the devil tells you. Pray continually, use scripture as your weapon. I believe we have to take care of our entire person-spirit, mind, and body, in order to fulfill our purpose. Spirt-stay in connection with God and seek Him in everything. Mind- establish healthy behaviors and seek counseling when needed. Body- eat nourishing foods and take care of our temple. I will be praying for you and others suffering with this illness.

  18. Wow! Thank you sharing! Your courage is phenomenal. I started following you from Myleik Teele when she posted that Chicken avocado chicken wrap and I was hooked. Congrats on the upcoming book.

  19. Thank you so much for yourtransparency, I so badly wanted tocome through the screen and just hold you, not for you, but for me. One thing you said without saying but I always say is protect your energy, protect your virtue, I'm very careful about who i share with and what I share. when I'm not at my strongest mentally I am careful about who I make physically contact with as well, I wont give hugs or hand shakes i dont want to be touch or allow anyone to touch me, it's part of my anxiety but i also strongly believe that you pass energy through touch, and I dont want people to feel the way I do.

    I totally understand. I come from a very spiritual/religious family and house hold. But I battled depression my whole entire life. To my family, classmates and friends I seemed fine. I offer got in trouble at school for not focusing and daydreaming, but they didnt know I was just sad.
    Besides fighting with my mother a lot who was often upset with my father. I felt I didnt have a reason to be said or depressed but I was. I can remember way back to the age of 6yrs young, thinking I was better off dead. At the age of 16 I had a big fight with my mom, my dad just watched and listened to her say very hateful things to me. I tried to call family who said they're always there, none of them answered. The night of 09/10/2001 was my breaking point, I stormed upstairs to the bathroom, locked myself in and swallowed a whole bottle of aspirin. I knew I had done wrong immediately after I did it, I went to my room laid in my bed and start praying "Now I lay me down to sleep, I pray MY GOD, My soul to keep, If I should die before I wake, I pray MY GOD my soul to take Ame-" Before I could seal my prayer my dad bursted in my room, someone had gone in to the bathroom after me and noticed or brand new bottle of aspirin were gone. He snatched me out the bed and made me drink milk, and walk the living room door an hour, mowing he couldn't let me sleep, he and I got dressed and walked out neighborhood (it was approximately 10pm) I think we walked and talked for 3 to four hours, my dad told me He never knew I needed them. I was always the responsible child out of his 3, and of all I was the strongest in Christ. I didnt know what to say but I felt defeated.
    The next day 9-11 my mom made me go to school. I was sitting in my 11th grade history class as everyone was watching breaking news on the television. I couldnt keep my head up, i looked and felt like death. My teacher called me out the class and asked what was going on. She thought maybe I got ahold of some bad drugs. I explained to her what happened and she sent me to the nurse who made me go home. I had to walk back home with my big brother and wait for my mother to get off work to take me to the hospital. Checking into the ER I remember laying in bed with a terrible ringing in my ears, I looked up and noticed an airplane on the TV crashing into a big building, I couldnt hear what the TV was saying but the blurred letters read something about the second plan just hit. I spent a week in the hospital with someone watching me THE WHOLE ENTIRE TIME! Never could I have visitors, My phone calls were monitored, I couldnt even potty and shower by myself. Once released I felt different, I truly believe I took my own life that day, but I also believe a new me was born. I went on with life doing great, learning to cope, I struggle with anxiety, but never was on medication. last year I was dealing with a lot and started feeling anxious and tired all the time. I decided to go to the clinic at work, I told them I'm not ok, I didnt understand what I was saying but I just knew to tell the I am not ok, I explained all of my symptoms, was taken through a mental evaluation and then diagnosed with major depression, 32, single, with a 5 yr old child, I had t accept it, I took medication and counseling for about 4 months, then I took myself off and started to meditate and speak life to myself. I have so much greatness in me and so much to live for. Growing up I was taught that God created man in His image, I know that God is with in me, I often feel anxious in things happening that I cant control, So I will quote the Bible "Be anxious for nothing, in everything TRUST GOD" I also tell myself and this isnt in the Bible "To denied yourself, you also deny God, to limit yourself, you limit God" Someone told me 17 yrs ago "when you attempt to take your own life, you are telling God, you dont trust Him" I trust God, and I trust that everything will be ok, I also know that I'm not strong enough to face my mental problems on my own. or to pretend they dont exist.

  20. Kevin, I’m just seeing this video. Your an awesome awesome awesome person. You’ve touched my life. I ran across your YouTube or IG about 3 years ago. I have not made one damn dish from your page yet BUT I’m going to. Thank you for being an awesome fitness instructor because food is ONE major component.

  21. Thank you so much Kevin for sharing your story. I struggle with depression all my life and it takes me a long time to fine what’s helping me. I know now that the most important thing is to be honest about what I’m feeling with my self and my family. I like to center my self by doing yoga every evening, and I don’t blame my self if I’m too tired or busy, but I’ll always try to make time for self care.

  22. Wow this was so brave of you to make this video! This is very inspiring. I've been watching your keto meal prep videos online for a minute now and in my opinion – they are probably some of the best meal prep tutorials on youtube for keto! Anyways, I started following some of the recipes…. and that alone has helped me out a lot to stay on track….But this blog – this is so inspiring and touching to know that no matter the struggle the human spirit is resilient. Please dont stop making videos your voice is more powerful than you may ever be able to know !

  23. You are so IMPORTANT TO LIFE! YOURS MINE AND OURS…..The color YELLOW makes my day makes me happy and it brightens up other peoples day! But when it gets bad my favorite song in the world is by Yoland Adam's Open My Heart! Lastly I try to remind myself "IT DOESN'T HAVE TO BE AS GOOD AS IT IS RIGHT NOW " Thank You Kevin for SHARING

  24. Kevin, this is your most powerful video. I've watched it many times, because we see the perfect side of everyone on social media, but it takes true courage to show our weaknesses. God bless you brother. This video will help more people than probably most of your others.

  25. People like you that have a level of fame sharing something so personal can help so many. Even still, I know how hard it is to share so openly. I worked with young adults for almost six years, and shared my own demons with them to help them. All the while, the sharing helped me even more. Mad respect for sharing something so deeply personal. It's so hard, but you never know how many lives are touched by it and are then able to seek help for their own issues. I've loved this channel since I found it, and now I sincerely have mad love for you as a person.

  26. Wow, thanks for opening up and sharing! I have watched your channel for years and had no idea but can certainly empathize with the struggle. Your words and vulnerability will help others.

  27. One day, overweight and sad, i discovered an instagram profile called fit men cook. I just loved the videos and started trying to do the recipes. Without you knowing you were part of my journey to become fit and never ever boring. Please know that you inspire me everyday. Sending you a huge hug from Macau, China!

  28. Kevin, Thank you for sharing your story. It is very powerful! I commend your courage and vulnerability. Your story will give many people hope and inspiration to deal with with their mental health struggles. Totally agree that education is a must and for those interested in learning, I recommend a fantastic 12 week course taught by NAMI (National Alliance for the Mentally Ill). The course is called Family to Family and it educates family members of those struggling with mental health issues on the complete range of disorders (anxiety to schizophrenia), how to communicate with their loved ones with the illness and how to become advocates for them. There is also a course for those who suffer from mental illness as well though I don't remember the name. Mental illness afflicts about 25% of the US population and it's about time to break the stigma around it and bring compassion, understanding and help to those suffering. Thanks again for doing this and may God bless you!

  29. You're so awesome. This vlog is so necessary. Your candidness and vulnerability make you even more awesome. I have several relatives who suffer from severe anxiety, and I myself am familiar with the (seemingly) futile battle with depression. I didn't have a name for it until my sophomore year in college almost 20 years ago (in which I nearly flunked out after isolating myself in my dorm room for an entire semester). Thank you so much for shedding light on mental health! I've seen how dangerous social media can be when used to distract and mask, delaying help. You just pushed me to revisit some things I've been avoiding for a year. You're the best, Kev. I'm an even BIGGER fan now! ✌💖

  30. Thanks for sharing your story, Kevin. You are such a talented guy and i truly look up to you #inspo. It sounds like you're in a good place and I wish the best for your future journey

  31. Your awesome as you are, you don’t need approval, just being you is morrrre than enough
    Stay blessed brave one ☝️

  32. Your awesome as you are, you don’t need approval, just being you is morrrre than enough
    Stay blessed brave one ☝️

  33. I just want to thank you for making this video Kevin. It’s never easy to deal with depression and anxiety . So I thank you and congratulate you for having the strength to make a video like this .

  34. Wow of all the people I'm subbed to I would have never thought you were going thru these things. We always think we are the only ones and everyone else is happy.. In this bubble and we are NOT. thank you for opening up and sharing. I understand beyond words. Also.. To anyone here…. You matter. You effect people in ways you may never know. But know that you do.

  35. You are so BRAVE! You helped me shed weight with you recipes and I appreciate you sooo much! Thank you for this video! Fit men talk about their emotions! Much love!

  36. Thank you for sharing. How I have overcome depression was through Jesus Christ. That's not everyone's story, but this may encourage someone. When I do have moments where I feel like I'm back in that hole, I will sing songs and say things that declare positivity over my life. I will remind myself that I'm not alone. I will say/sing things like, "I will live, I will not die!" "I'm an overcomer!" "God has not given me a spirit of fear, but of power, love, and a sound mind!" "You're the lifter of my head!" I'll read scriptures such as Psalm 3:3, psalm 91:1, John 14:27

  37. Excellent video! I'm so glad that you were candid about your mental health challenge. Men in general, yet add in a Black man, are highly stigmatized about their mental illness and end up folding into themselves instead of seeking treatment. Society needs to do a better job and reject the ideology that "men don't feel" and should support them when they admit their struggle (s).

  38. Hello , Sir , I'd just like to say I love your videos .I'm a guy who has depression too .I've had it since my teens and it has never gone away.I might have one day a week when I feel "normal" ,and then only a few hours in that day. My parents don't give a crap , they think I'm weak because I'm a guy and so I get up in the morning , go to work and make a living ,and that's that. They don't care if I live or die ,so one morning ,when I wake up I'm thinking of leaving this shitty world when I can't take it any more and no body
    cares . I admire your honesty ,it's takes a brave man to show his depression like that in public ,I couldn't do it.So I feel soooo alone and helpless and I wish somebody cared about the way I feel .So , great video and good day to you Sir , all the best !!

  39. Kev, I'mma be honest I don't have a routine and I'm currently bottoming out. I absolutely love this video though so I will try (for you) to keep going with the help of your tips

  40. I can definitely relate to you! I myself face the same thing. You have massive courage and I wish well! Thanks for sharing!🙂

  41. Thank you so much for sharing your story. It really gives so many people hope out there. What's important is that those who suffer from depression realize they can heal…it just takes time. Healing takes time. Depression is very real. Unfortunately within my own experience, have I encountered many people not understanding what depression is, thus they dismiss it as 'attention seekers'. Far too many people, young and old, struggle with depression and the reality of it all is not everybody knows how to deal with it. A small amount of people have support, whereas others have no support whatsoever. In my personal journey with depression, I've dealt with family and friends and strangers as well, that only judged me for how I was feeling and never took the time to understand what depression is all about. I've struggled with depression and anxiety for 20 years and after much inner healing, treatment, exercising positivity and searching for alternative methods, I am depression and anxiety free for the past 4 years. Healing takes time, patience, perseverance and dedication. It takes a will wanting to heal. You need to be brave, strong, kind and gentle with yourself starting the healing process. Every single person heals on their own time. No-one can be forced when he or she needs to 'lighten up' or 'be healed already'. This takes time. Due to depression and anxiety, I wasn't able to cope with a normal day job. I've had my fair share of struggles with suicidal thoughts up to such an extent where my husband decided to leave his daily job, work from home and help me heal. Knowing depression, anxiety etc. all too well, I've started a blog and YouTube channel, where I share my personal journey with the world and show you that it is possible to rise from self-destruction to healing and ultimately self-discovery. I am standing strong today and I can confidently tell you all, it is very possible to heal from depression. Just hang in there. Take it day by day. Baby steps. Blog link: http://lyranheart.com/ YouTube Depression video link: https://youtu.be/nZ47Efhu2FE I love your 5 points you share with us, to show how one can help yourself during a normal day. Acknowledgment is probably the most important first step you can take. Depression often requires deep-rest…so you know what…go and rest. But also, be active. Exercise a bit every day. Foods play such a huge role in healing…I've experienced this myself! Cut out sugars and caffeine – they shoot up your adrenaline levels, thus making you feel way more anxious. Bring in more fruits and vegetables into your diet. And then, let's have a quick look at alternative methods when all other healing methods have failed you… Cannabis oil – research this – it has helped me and millions of people out there suffering from depression and anxiety. Ayahuasca – just research this… I went on my very first Ayahuasca ceremony Oct 2017…it changed my life. My husband went for his ceremony March 2018…it helped him so much. My mother-in-law and other family members also went for their ceremonies. Just research Ayahuasca – do your own research – sometimes when we struggle with an illness, and nothing so far has helped, we then turn to alternative methods which in most cases have helped us on our healing journey. Once again, thank you for sharing your story.

  42. Thanks so much for sharing it is appreciated and I can so relate. Over here tearing. I really am touched and can't thank u enough for opening up about this.😍😍 xoxoxo

  43. I’ve been following you for a long time on Instagram but only recently started watching over here on YouTube. Just found this video a few months late. You are so incredible!! My partner is currently working through PTSD and depression so everything you’ve said resonates with me. You have come such a long way and carry yourself so well. I know it must have been so difficult to do this video, it was so brave to not edit out the parts where you broke down a bit. I’ve loved your content and message for so long. Thank you for sharing such a vulnerable part of your life on your big platform. Xx

  44. I relate and feel ya.. I dealt with depression my whole life and was diagnosed with Major Depressive disorder in 2012 from my V.a hospital.. I was prescribed antidepressants 6yr prior zolof, Celexa, Mirtizipine, Depokote then stopped once I received my diagnosis. I manage by faith and working out.. Homelessness, deaths of those closest to me in my family at an young age ( my mom passed when I was 13yrs old while visiting my dad who I met a week after my 13th birthday for the first time.. Also have Anxiety Disorder, Borderline personality disorder ( I get it ) your on point. I get it

  45. Like wow..You touched on so many key points…can I be your friend?😆. On the real though, thanks for opening up. Maybe one day I can be as brave as you👍🏾,

    ❤️from Aussie.

  46. Hey Kevin, thank you for sharing your story with us. You are strong and brave for talking about what you went through. It is very encouraging, thank you for the tips!

  47. Yes, yes, yes….I agree with Jen G. it is sign of strength to be this open. It takes a STRONG person to share like this! I too have dealt with depression and look forward to the day when society widely recognizes it as the physical illness it is. While it is certainly true that our thought habits and general life habits can have a big impact on our mood for some people there is a huge physical component to their depression for which medication can be extremely beneficial. My daughter and I have been helped dramatically with medications. To anyone who is feeling that they cannot share their struggle with anyone…I encourage you to find someone who will encourage and support you. If those around you do not then seek out friends, doctors, support groups etc. who will… God's Blessings to All, Christy

  48. Hey Kevin, so… I’m kind of on the same boat as you. I have been suffering from depression for the last 13 years and have been overcoming from it. And I get it. And I have been meds for it consistently for 13 years and it’s not something that can be cured. Mental health must be approached just as much time and effort as our physical health. Glad to know you’re doing well now. Keep it up!! 😊

  49. I teared up when you broke down because it hit so close to home! You’re such a strong person Kev! Thank you so much for this video

  50. THANK YOU FOR SHOWING YOUR PAIN. A LOT OF TIMES WE ARE IN SO MUCH PAIN BUT WE HIDE IT. AND THE WAY YOU CHOKED AND CRIED, THAT IS HOW MUCH PAIN WE ARE IN SOMETIMES. THANK YOU FOR SHOWING US IT'S OK TO SHOW VULNERABILITY. IS OK.

  51. Just came across this. Have watched so much of your videos and they've helped with me with my health and getting my life together. A lot of people have struggled with their mental health, and it takes a great man to not only wear it, but help others out by relating to his own experience. Watching this today, has really cheered me up and instilled hope. You're the best ! God bless.

  52. So powerful! Thank you for sharing & adding meaningful videos to YouTube. This is important. And difficult to talk about. But we have to. You are creating huge & life changing inspiration. THANK YOU! 🙏🙏🙏

  53. Que grande eres! Una gran persona, debes ser muy sensible y exigente contigo mismo. Viendo tus vídeos transmites alegría, parece que todo lo que cocinas es muy fácil, sano y rico 😀… y claro nadie somos felices todo el tiempo, no nos engañas, eres honesto, todos tenemos malas rachas y épocas mejores, lo importante es que has salido de ellas! Transmites mucho, tienes un gran sentido del humor, talento y te mereces muchas cosas buenas! Quizás lo mejor es tomar medicación para que no sufras esos bajones que te hacen daño y son impredecibles. Es un vídeo muy especial ❣️ te admiro mucho por lo valiente que eres mostrando tus debilidades, esto demuestra lo grande que eres, con un gran corazón. Por otra parte, ya tengo apuntadas un montón de recetas 😅👍🏼 Un abrazo desde Barcelona!! Cuídate muuucho!! 😘

  54. Thank you
    I find the hardest thing to do is reach out.
    I learnt from a very young age to not rely on anyone but myself.
    Going through a real bad depression and spent to long in my bedroom feeling hopeless.
    I so want my life back. Finding it so difficult to motivate myself even to do basic things.
    So hoping to move out of this soon x

  55. Thank you for this video I've felt at a low point where I constantly struggle with eating and health that I gain gain gain and feel insecure. You are very strong and truly inspired me to care more for myself and my health.

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