Stressagains: The Restaurant for Stress-Eating

(ringing phone) (door knock) – Hey buddy, you’re working too hard. You should take a break. – I don’t know man. – Come on, are ya hungry? – No. – Perfect. We’re going to Stressagain’s! – Stressagain’s! – [Narrator] Welcome to Stressagain’s! The first all stress eating restaurant. – Alright what can I get you guys? – Fucking whatever. – Okay great. – I’ll have the same. – [Waitress] Alright. – Oh any of this will do. (phone message sounds) – [Narrator] At Stressagain’s
we know that your world is spinning out of
control and you just need to satisfy a basic animal need to make things feel right
for a fleeting instant so come get your piggy little
hands on our new specials! Just a fist-full of dry
cereal shoved into your mouth. Parmesan cheese on an old tortilla. Something crunchy, you know to balance out the soft tortilla. Something, uh, sweet to
balance out the saltiness. Then something salty to
balance out all that sweet! Then something sweet- – Now that’s an immediate hit of dopamine. – That’s the kind of momentary distraction my mom used to make. – How you guys doing? – (talking over each other)
I’m gonna be honest with you – Ya know I’ve been better – I’m kind of falling apart a little bit – It’s been a really hard fucking day – My head is just in a
million places all at once – Like this is kind of helping but I don’t even know what I’m doing – Great, hey do you mind if I join you? – Get in here! – [Waitress] This shit has been crazy! – Hey, should we get more? – Maybe just one more thing. – You said that five orders ago! (laughing) – [Narrator] And Stressagain’s
is the only restaurant that straight up invites
you into the kitchen to just eat whatever
the fuck you can find. Stare vacantly into our
fridge to see if you can find the thing that will finally
fill that empty part inside you. Hint: jalapeno poppers won’t do it! Ha ha! But you’ll eat them anyway! And don’t forget to try
our happy hour specials. Just one beer to loosen me up. Shot of some weird liquor
from Albania or some shit. And fuck it, another beer. So come on down to
Stressagain’s and mindlessly shovel food into your gaping maw. You’ll regret ya ever did! – Stressagain’s, eat your- – Actually let me get like, milk, just uh, something creamy- – [Waitress] Oh we got that!
Yeah yeah yeah we got that! – Hi, it’s Mike Trapp from College Humor. Click here to subscribe, click
here for more fun things, and send help to keep me from sinking. Please. Please help! Please help!

About the author

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *