Causes, Medications, and Therapies
I'm not gay but … I watched this video and I have to say, I respect you a lot Kati. It's always nice to see people who just want to help other people 🙂
I never really "came out". I brought the same girl home with me for a decade. When I invited my mom to our wedding, she cried for 6 months. :/
This is a great video! 🙂
I've realized that coming out isnt a single action, it's another phase. You'll have to come out thousands of times in your life to different people, but it's more and more freeing every time you do it. I'm a 19 year old cis woman who identifies as a lesbian
So very happy you made this!
I have my coming out story up on my channel talking about the process of coming out and also dealing with homophobia as I grew up with homophobic parents. So many others have shared their story and struggles in the comments there so if you feel like you're alone dealing with this, you're definitely not!
I once hated myself for being gay. I was told I was disgusting by my parents and I believed them. I was so ashamed and never thought I would ever feel comfortable telling anyone. Now I live with my partner and it's the most normal thing in the world to me. Don't listen to anyone who tells you to be ashamed, especially if it's yourself. You ARE normal, and worthy of love exactly how you are. I promise it gets better. <3
My friend recently came out. I'm glad she trusts me enough to talk to me about it and I'm glad she's not afraid of showing this part of her anymore. 🙂
I remember coming out to ky mom at 19 as bi and she almost lost it but then we talk some more snd tgings turned out great but most of my friends still don't know i am bi i hope to come out to them soon but i fear some will walk out on ky friendship so i hold back now dont want to alone again for being me
Amazing advice, I hope this video helps people. Coming out for me was the best thing I could've ever done, it was also rather easy cause my mom kind of knew since I was young, even before I did haha
I came out to my parents when I was 13 through my therapist and it went really well 🙂 having the therapist there helped
If you're not indipendent on your own finances, please think really hard before telling. Try to test the waters and see if the people you're dependant on will be still willing to support you. We don't want you end up on a road. An article mentioned how in USA, many of the homeless people were LGBTQ, because they got kicked out of their household.
Such a helpful video. Thank you! xox
I came out when I was 16 (last year) and have a friend group of 9 guys, I talked to everyone individually, some didn't believe me but it was fine, some were weird but it was fine in the end. I'm glad I done it.
I would just say acknowledge people will find out and don't freak out when they do like I did.
Honestly, I don't believe in coming out. I'm gay and I did come out when I was 18, but I regret it. Not because I had a bad experience but because I've realized that "coming out" just enforces the idea that LGBT people are "different" and must make an announcement to the world that they're different. I hope to see a day where we don't need to "come out" and all sexualities are viewed as normal and acceptable.
Side note: "coming out" means someone or something is putting us in in the first place (cough heteronormativity) just something to think about.
Did you know that recently in Ireland out Minister for Health has just come out. Its a great time in Ireland for people coming out.
Its not good for people's mental health, that people have to hide their sexual orientation.
Love and peace
Hopefully in the near future people don't have to "come out". I wish we lived in a world where people would not feel the need to label themselves.
I haven't come out to family, because they are extremely against it. I could be wrong, but I don't think it has been necessary as I have never been in a relationship. This makes me sad, as there is a huge hole there. But if I was to have a relationship with a girl, I think it would be important enough for me to come out then.
Thank you for addressing this issue. It's always nice to see videos that are encouraging and supportive of the LGBTQ community. It took me a long time to come to a conclusion about my own sexuality. I didn't come out to my parents until I was 30 and was currently in a relationship. It didn't go as well as I hoped it would. Perhaps you can do another video on how to cope with family and friends who are not supportive.
Kati what do you think of Aversion therapy? Reading about it its do disturbing
I haven't had an official "hey I'm here & queer" experience, but if my friends sincerely ask I'm like "lol no I'm not straight, I'm bi". my friends who follow me on tumblr know bc I talk about my bisexuality a lot, but I don't mind since the people from my school who follow me are pretty chill. however, my parents don't know and I don't think I'll ever tell them until I have a girlfriend or something because they don't believe bisexuality even exists. my aunts question my sexuality, only because I've never had a boyfriend, which I think is pretty unfair. my family cares more about me not being in a relationship than I do! anyway, I don't find it necessarily at this time of my life to "come out". I'm not ashamed of my sexuality and I try not to hide it.
I always feel like there is so much pressure to come out right away; like it is necessary to tell everyone but I'm not really sure why this is. Thanks Kati, this video was really helpful. 🙂 It clears up confusion and is reassuring because it reduces some pressure & anxiety about whether or not I may have to come out <3
Great video, Kati. I wasn't so keen on the bit about "deciding," but I understood what you were trying to get at. I can only wish for a world where coming out is a thing of the past and it isn't a huge deal to be amongst the sexual minority.
Your effect on the minds and hearts of others continues to amaze; you really nailed it by providing a mix of thoughtful understanding; factual information, open-minded acceptance, and practical advice. You're such a special, special individual, Kati!!! On behalf of everyone – THANK YOU!!!
How can we get in touch with you
Thanks for helping the LGBT community babe <3333
Hey Kati. I wanted to ask you if could talk more about derealisation. I am suffering from it many years now and I don't even know why . I remember the exact time when it apperead but I can't remember anything bad that could have cause derealisation that time. How is that possible ?
GREAT VIDEO! I love how you touched on every ifs ands or buts. When I came out I really didn't have anybody there that I could talk to. My dad was the one that took it the worst. For two years we barely talked. I don't know who was hurt worse by it. Him or I. That is all change now. We are back to being close and I can talk to him about my relationship.
hey Kati, I have issues with depression and I'm in group therapy for that. But something really strange happened last time. We got a little break to go to the toilet and stuff, and so I did; together with two others. While being in the toilet one of them got a knife out of their pocket and started cutting, and asked me and the other girl if we want to cut too.. I said no but she said yes and I saw her cutting too! It was really triggering and it has caused a lot of anxiety attacks.. I don't really know of I should tell anyone or not, I want them to trust me but this is not really normal right?Thanks for answering, you're videos are amazing!
Hey Kati, I think I have depression and I really want to talk to someone but there's no one I really trust. And if I told someone they probably wouldn't care. Or they wouldn't believe me. They'd probably think I'm just seeking for attention. I don't know what to do. I want to tell someone so bad but at the same time I really don't want to.
could you do an updated video on anorexia considering that the definition/"requirements" have changed?
Hi Kati. I have always been a picky eater but I realized that I am not a normal picky eater. I'm 16 years old and when my relatives want me to eat certain foods, I get really anxious. And if they do convince me to eat it, I start to cry and I gag. They say that I'm doing it for attention because there's no way I could be that scared of trying new foods. I researched it and it sounds like I have ARFID. But the descriptions are really vague and I'm not sure. The only vegetables I can eat are carrots and corn without having anxiety but I don't like them. And I don't eat fruit either but most of it doesn't give me anxiety. But all vegetables do especially peppers. I can't even stand the smell without gagging. I eat a variety of food but all of it is non fruit and vegetable. Could you do a video on ARFID as not a lot of people even know what it is and it would really help me out to know if it applies to me? Thanks your videos are always so helpful
I told everyone I was gay via email…probably not a good idea but it worked.
I feel like I want to have a mental illness, I keep looking at diagnoses of mental illness and checks to see if I identify with them. It started after I started to "recover" I was starving myself, I had a binge, I was fasting, obsessed with food and weight, I cut myself, I still have anxieties, and I still feel fat. But now I'm so much better because my therapist helped me. But she did not give me any diagnosis, she never said I had an eating disorder (it's pretty obvious that I had), or even the behavior of eating disorders, she just helped me fix my behavior. I feel strange, what I do want to have mental problems? the onely time that I feel bad about my "problem" is when kind of professional is telling me that someting is worng with me. It is strange to want to be sick? I am very ashamed to tell it to my therapist, I do not think I ever tell her that. How can I stop thinking like that? I'm .very obsessed with mental health.
hey Kati thank you so much for all your efforts to upload those helpful videos, Ive recently recovered from binge eating disorder,and my body is just so ruined, and I don't feel hungry at all, I can stay the whole day with out eating then I realize at night time that I ate nothing, and here is my question how do I get hunger back??
Wow, Im not gay, but probably best to wait until you are out of your parents house and sorta self sufficient to come out. I think college is the best time to do it. I'm an atheist from the deep south, and I didn't "come out" with my atheism until college.
My thoughts on this topic? There shouldn't be such thing as "coming out". Most people need to start realising that we are born in a certain way, and all feelings are valid. Being attracted to the same gender shouldn't be seen as 'out of the norm', because it's not (therefore, they shouldn't be 'forced' to 'confess' they're gay/lesbian/etc…). Society needs to stop categorising people like we were different being according to our beliefs, likes, etc. We all are human beings. Period.
Is anyone else wondering what's happened to kati? She hasn't made a video in a week I hope she's OK I'm getting worried. There's also no activity o her other social media sites
Also, you should check out Everyoneisgay.com!
I wish you would stick to the breathing
is it possible for therapist to prescribe placebo instead of real pills?
Thank you you are so helpful and my friends know but still thank you you are extremely helpful
And I also have the problem that my family religion believes that any other thing that's straight is the devils work
This isn't on coming out but I do have a quesion though. Statistics for my area say that 1 in 3 of people with mental health get the help we need. This would explain why I don't get any help with mental issues. I've been fighting clinical major depression for what seems to be my entire life. My question is this: IF people dealing with this can't get the help that they need to live some sort of normal life what ever that is then why isn't the help available where does one turn not even living a normal life which I don't know what that is. I guess normal is what I'm not.
I just want to say it is also very important to consider whether you will be safe after you come out. Make sure that if something were to change in your living situation because of coming out, you have somewhere to go and someone to turn to. Make sure that if your parents kick you out, you have a plan of a person to stay with and a way to support yourself.
I'm never coming out haha
Good video Kati 🙌
I'm going to meet my aunt who has been battling cancer for a number of years now. She believes my (mdd, ptsd, bipolar 2) is just hormonal and wants me to meet with her alternative doctor. I've opened up to her that I am very poorly but I feel like because she has the cancer that she somehow thinks I should be able to get over what I am feeling. She keeps telling me that it's just about letting go of negative emotions. I have just started treatment and still very raw. But at the same time, I feel some guilt, because she has cancer and has gone through chemo twice and I feel somehow that I should be able to just dust myself off and be fine. I'm afraid of what she'll tell me tomorrow. I don't want to backtrack with my treatment. But I also don't want to hurt her.
My parents did not really react They kinda just went Ok I am Bi sexual no One Else In my family knows cause some Of them Are very religious
I would like to now if there is any books or learning material for the parents of children who are LGBTQ? I am Christian but I never discriminated against or was mean to people in this lifestyle. I do believe in the biblical marriage the way God defines it. My sister has been with her same sex partner for 30 years and they recently got married. I was happy for them. After my husband and I separated it came to my attention that my 24 year old daughter was interested in a female coworker of mine who was actually my friend. The saddest part about it is that they didn't even tell me about it; I came home from work one night and found them all snuggly and cozy in my apartment. I tried to be cool but I totally couldn't pull it off and I flipped out extemely…not quite Westboro Baptist but close. My daughter, her girlfriend and I repaired our relationship and they were going on living together for 7 months and then my daughter comes to me and says her partner is abusive and she and her son(she had him at 16) need a place to live. So I spent a lot of money and got into a 2 bedroom apartment and moved her and my grandson in with me. Her ex girlfriend and I said unkind things to each other after they broke up; my daughter refused to allow me to talk to her after she told me my daughter is an open bisexual(I argued because if she was open about it no one would have to tell me). I accused her of manipulating and corrupting my daughter because my daughter has never been interested in any other female. She ….well at any rate it got super ugly and my daughter was trying to protect me and blocked her off my phone. Then my daughter started dating her ex boyfriend and stopped cause she is still interested in this woman. Now my problem is that she is dating this woman again and sleeping over her house and everything; I unblocked the woman's cell phone with hopes that we could communicate and become friends again but my daughter said she has no desire to talk to me again so now what happens? I'm afraid if they get back together again I will have no more contact with my daughter and grandson after she blatently used me for a place to live so she can go back to this woman who may or may not have been abusive? It is all so confusing and hurtful and she doesn't understand why; she won't talk to me about it; she goes out and my grandson tells me they are over at her house….. am I overreacting or being a drama queen-her words? I just don't now what to do. I don't feel like I can even talk to any one about it. I used to talk to my mom but she died in February and I now I have no one to talk to. So I'll put it out there and hopefully have lots of advice coming in but please be kind because I am hurting and heartbroken. Even though I don't agree with this lifestyle if I want to stay in my daughter and grandson's life I have to accept it and I don't now how to….. Please help.
One more thing: Be EXTREMELY cautious who you tell and what you do before you tell. I was forced to come out one year ago (FOR THE FIRST TIME) and I was just in a public chatroom with some people and I was incognito (even tho some classates knew what my username was) and I just talked to some people and when I said it, two classmates joined…Then I felt pressure to tell them. Now I don't regret anything, since now I am really good friends with those two… But before we were friends, let's just say….the rumours spread quickly. Now because of the bullying I endured, tomorrow I am going to take my school-changing exams and I will be against 5 other people…
This was so helpful, I am coming out to my Uncle (no idea I'm LGBTQ+) and my Mam (knows I was questioning) today. Without this, I would have no prep and would've most likely forgotten to say something or just not had the confidence to do it. Thank you. Here's hoping it goes well!
Dont be ashamed of begin gay I have to cousins who are gay they are the most kindest people
But what about coming out with mental health issues?
I’ve been out as trans for a long time and have tried to come out to my mom, I’m hoping that when I get to start seeing a therapist we can take it on and help me try to explain it to my mom because she doesn’t understand
It take me 4 years to full release but I not out to my parent. I am out to my friends. ❤️❤️❤️🏳️🌈🏳️🌈🏳️🌈
I told my family I was bi when I was 15. They told me, no and that I was straight. I told my friends I was bi when I was 18. 2 people came out as bi also and I feel free to talk about cute girls around my friends ^_^
I know you will not respond, but what if you have no one?
I want to come out to my parents it’s my senior year and I think I’m ready but I don’t know what my mom response is gonna be she never mentions about the lgbtq community
I’m close to my dad and I thought he would be supportive but he wasn’t . It’s hard because he always comments about the lgbt community and it hurts because me his daughter is part of it
Honestly I came here trying to find a way to come out to my therapist I want to kill myself without going into psychiatric care
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