Angie has been convinced that Joe’s having an affair, and something that you’re struggling with right now is you’re trying to decide, are you telling me that I’m not thinking what I’m thinking, or are you telling me that I’m lying to myself, what is it you’re telling me? Right? Absolutely. And Dr. Sophy said it very clear, you are thinking what you’re thinking. And we tend to believe ourselves. You’re telling yourself that he’s doing what he’s doing, you just have no basis for it. Well I believe I have basis for it, just because I believe women have intuition. No, no, no, you’re telling yourself you have a basis for it.
Right. Well, like I said, in the beginning I had more proof than what I have now, and I did let other people listen to it and they heard the same thing.
But do you understand the proof that you’re using, is a little bit like this, that you then blow up into a reality, because of the medication and the brain changes in your chemistry. The other thing you need to think about is what are the effects that have happened to you since you retired? You probably don’t feel useful as much as you did.
No I don’t. And that you’re projecting a lot of that, you know, I’m not good enough, he’ll want somebody else, all of that stuff gets through that filter. And about Adderall, you said something that was really interesting to me about Adderall. This really jumped out to me. You said, I will stop taking Adderall when I’m secure. And you will feel secure when you stop taking Adderall. Right. And you need to understand the difference between anxiety and fear. Anxiety is a nervous disorder that’s characterized by excessive uneasiness and apprehension in the absence of realistic threat. Fear is proportionate apprehension to a realistic threat. Now what’s that mean to you? I really don’t have any answer for that. Too many words. Yes, over my head.
OK, let me explain. Let me explain what I mean. Anxiety is excessive uneasiness. Excessive.
Yes. Too much.
Yes. In the absence of a realistic threat. So if I come into your kitchen, and I say, snake, and you get up and dive through the picture window, (Angie laughs) OK, that is excessive uneasiness in the absence of a realistic threat. Now on the other hand, if I come in and I put a snake on your kitchen table, and so you get up and you run out the door, OK, that’s a proportionate reaction to a realistic threat. There’s a real snake on your kitchen table. Yeah. That’s fear, that’s when you have an appropriate reaction to a real threat. Yes. The problem is when you have a exaggerated reaction when there’s no real threat. You don’t have any real evidence that he’s having an affair. But you’re having a lot of anxiety about it, and you’re paralyzed, because you’re on drugs.